Freckles Comes Home | Johnny Downs | Old Crime Movie | Action

Who is it? It's me, Raymond. Well, how about it? What did you find out? Plenty. They spotted you making your getaway. Boy, you're hotter than a firefighter. The cops are covering every train and bus depot in the city. I've got to get out of here somehow. Don't worry about it. We'll fix it. How? Well, we'll drive you out of the city, wait and hop a bus and get away without being recognized. Yeah. That ought to do it. This is it, Jack. The bus ought to be along any minute now. Thanks, boys. I'll drop you a line as soon as I get located. We'll let you know the minute the heat's off. Good. Care to look at some of the paper? No. No, thanks. I never read them. Oh, I can understand that. My gosh. Except for politics and the war, all you see in the papers these days is crime, hold-ups, murders, killings. Is that so? Yeah, but that's only in the city. You never hear of anything like that happening in my hometown. That where you're headed? Yeah. A town called Fairfield. Never heard of it. Oh, I don't suppose many people have. Well, it isn't much of a town. Only has a population of about 500. Frank Bass defined it on the map. Does, eh? Yeah. Supposed to be a lot bigger if it wasn't so darn far off the beaten path. You know, so hard to get to, nobody ever goes there. Sounds like a nice spot for a fellow to take a rest. Oh, you couldn't find a better place. All the peace and quiet you could ask for. Right in the heart of the Indiana Limber Lord. Yeah? Maybe just the place I'm looking for. Got a hotel there? Oh, sure. Sure, Danny Doyle, a pal of mine, he runs it with his uncle. You know, Danny's the real reason I'm going back home. He got in some kind of a jam and he wants me to help him out. But he's all right. You'll like him. Well, I'm not looking for company. The idea of a little visit there sounds pretty interesting. Uh-huh. What did you say the name of the town was? Fairfield. I'd like to see that bus pull in on time just once. Oh, Mr. Danny, this thing is heavy. Can I just set it down and wait till Mr. Freckles gets here? You're lucky I don't make you wear it around your neck after the mess you got us into. Gold diviner. Well, the man said it would find gold, didn't he? Sure, and you believed him. Well, that crazy gadget couldn't find anything. Well, the stuff we found looked like gold, didn't it? You're telling me? That was fool's gold. And we the fools, huh? You said it to the teeth. But look, Mr. Danny, suppose we scamper a couple of fools bigger than us and then we... Oh, save your breath, Jeff. They don't come any bigger than we are. I don't know. We ain't so big. Wait till you hear what's happened. We're in a... I didn't think it'd be anything simple. But save it till later, will you? I haven't seen my dad in quite a while. Oh, you can see him anytime. This is important. I've got to talk to you right away. All right, all right. But you can hold it a couple of minutes anyhow, can't you? I brought you a customer for the hotel. Oh, that's great. Thanks, Freckles. We can sure use the business. This is Danny Doyle, the fellow I was telling you about. He runs the hotel. And this is Mr., uh... Gosh, I never did find out your name. Leach. Jack Leach. Oh, glad to know you. I haven't heard about that jam. Take it easy, will you? There's plenty of time. If that's what you think. All right, all right. But wait till you take care of the man. He wants a room. Oh, sure, sure. Excuse me. Take Mr. Leach's bag, Jeff. Uh, excuse me. Would you hold this a minute, please, sir? Yeah. Thank you, sir. You see, it all began when Jeff got sold a bill of goods on that gold diviner. Oh, you ought to have your head examined. There's no such thing as a gold diviner that works. You know it. I know it now. But it looked good when Jeff ate it. Yeah, I ate it. Haven't got a couple old trunks you'd like to have me lug around, have you? Well, I've got a couple down in the basement. Who's in charge here, anyhow? Then we... For the love of Mike, Danny, I didn't expect to put a hotel across treating a guest like that. Attend to Mr. Leach. Then tell me about it. Yeah, sure. See that Mr. Leach is fixed up, will you, Jeff? Yes, sir. Argonaut Hotel at your service. You all want something in a room? Yeah. Bed. What's this? Oh, that's a gold brick. Gold brick? Yes, sir. Hey, you don't happen to own the Brooklyn Bridge, do you? Now, that's funny. A man wanted to sell me that bridge the other day. Never mind. Just get me the key. Yes, sir. Well, now, if it ain't young Winslow. Poetry. How are you, Constable? What brings you back to town? Did you get kicked out of school? No, no. Just thought I'd come home for a while. Oh, you did, eh? Well, things have been mighty peaceful up to now. Of course, I ain't saying you're as ornery as you used to be, but I ain't as tolerable as I used to be, neither. Don't be, Constable. I'm here strictly on a mission of peace. Well, you better have. But when you two young scallywags get your heads together, trouble starts brewing. So watch your step, both of you. My dander gets up easy these days. All set, Mr. Leach. Who's that? Oh, stranger in town, eh? Just getting in. That's right. Coming out on the bus, eh? Figuring on staying to stay out? I don't know. I might. Well, it's a mighty fine little town to settle down in. I'm sure it is. Yes, sir. Hey, uh, had I seen you someplace before? I don't think so. Face looks mighty familiar. You ain't the fellow that sold that water pump to Newt Whitley, are you? Leach's powerful bad. No, I've never been here before. Oh. Well, if you're figuring on staying here and want to pick up some land, I got 20 acres. That's a right smart bargain. Well, I'll think it over. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get unpacked. Oh, sure, sure. Don't let me stop you. Oh, say, by the way, we're having a big dance over at Will Tatum's barn tonight. Going to have some pretty fancy donuts. If you get a chance, why, drop over and meet some of the folks. Thanks. I'll see you. Good, good. Mighty fine gent. Yes, sir. Mighty. Say, if you fellas was more like him, you might amount to something someday. So the minute I figured we'd struck gold, I did what anybody would have done. I bought a 60-day option on the property. You bought? But how could you? Where'd you get the money? That's where the headache comes in. Before he left, Uncle Bert gave me the money for the payment on the hotel. And I said I'd give it to Mr. Potter at the bank. I don't know, Danny. I've helped you out of holes before. But this time, there's nothing I can do. I haven't the money to pay off Potter. Well, I'm not asking for the money. But look, I got a scheme all worked out. Uh-oh. It's a cinch. I'm going to subdivide the property and start a real estate boom. What? Are you completely crazy? It'll work. I'm sure of it. Up here, 1,000 miles from nowhere. It won't be if we bring a spur of the main highway up the valley and through my property. Think what it'll do for business. Why, it'll put Fairfield on the map. We'll have a real town for a change. Sounds great, Danny, but it won't work. You can never get the road commissioners to agree on it. Why not? Your father's one of them. You could bring him around, couldn't you? Well, even if I did, what about old man Potter? They haven't been speaking for years. Oh, they'd never get together. And you know it. Oh, I don't know. I think maybe you could swing it. How? Remember how you and Jane Potter were sweethearts when we were kids? Wait a minute. You're not suggesting I marry that gawky pigtail Potter brat? No, of course not. Nothing like that. But you used to be sweet on each other. Well, I mean, you know. You always were pretty good friends. Maybe you could get her to work on her dad. Oh, I don't know. I'll speak to my dad, all right? But as far as old man Potter's concerned, I have my doubts. He doesn't like me any better than he does my father. Yeah. Is it really as bad as all that, Dad? I'm afraid so, son. Well, then why didn't you tell me about it before? I could have done something. Oh, you had enough on your mind getting through college. I thought I could work it out in time. But with the town run down as it is and getting worse, it just couldn't be done. Hm. So the Winslow family is broke. I wouldn't say that. We still have the farm, and we're not in debt yet. Well, then don't you see? You just gotta help get that road through here. It's our only chance to get back what we've lost. I know that. It's been a dream of mine for years. But it's out of the question. All because of an argument you and Potter had years ago. What difference does that make? A lot of difference to me. It's a matter of pride. I'd rather lose everything than to make a step toward Potter. But maybe he wants the highway as much as you do. If he does, he'll come to me. Welcome to your place. Congratulations. Thank you. Yes, sir. Evening, Cosmo. Good evening. No, you don't, Lem Perkins. I want to talk to you. What's on your mind, Cosmo? You know what's on my mind. When are you fixing to pay me that $8 you owe me for pasturing that heifer of yours on my North 40? Had her for 10 weeks now, you know. Shucks, Constable. That heifer ain't worth more than $10. No? Well, then I reckon I can keep her for what you owe me. No. Can't do it. Ain't good business. But I'll tell you what. What? You keep her for two more weeks, and then you can have her. Evening, Constable. Hello, Constable. Keep her two more weeks. Keep who two more weeks, huh? Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Winslow. Dad, will you excuse me a minute? I want to go see Dad. Oh, certainly, son. None of your monkey shines now. I'll be watching you. Oh, sure. Hello, Danny. I've been on pins and needles waiting for you. What happened? What did your dad say? Well, to tell you the truth, Danny, it doesn't look too hot. Don't know. But don't let it get you down. Oh, no, no. Of course not. No, I mean it. I've been doing a lot of thinking. I believe I have an idea that might do it. Yeah, no kidding. Well, what is it? What are you going to do? Now, now, don't get excited. Just leave everything to me. Good old freckle. I knew you'd come through. Yeah. How are you, boys? Well, hello, Mr. Leach. Hello. Thought I'd drop around and see what was going on. Well, it looks like the local gentry's out for a big night, huh? What's the occasion? It's the loyal order of Cornhusker's annual dance. Oh? They always celebrate after the autumn harvest. The bigger the crop, the bigger the blowout. That makes sense. What's a fellow do about getting some refreshments around here? Just help yourself. Right up, gentlemen. Let's get yourself a slight libation. It ain't much, but if you can drink it, I can live. Oh, quit clowning, Jeff, and fill him up. Yeah, put a slice of orange in mine. I haven't had dinner yet. Yes, sir. Coming right up. Excuse me. Let's go. Yeah. Hello, Mr. Potter, Mrs. Potter. Oh, how do you do, Danny? How are you, Jane? Fine, Danny. Hello, Danny. I, uh, I don't see your uncle about. Isn't he here? No, sir. He went to Fort Wayne on business. I see. Undoubtedly, to negotiate with some other bank, like his friend Winslow. Could I see you for a minute, Jane? Yes. I got a surprise for you. There you go. Old friend of mine? Fred calls. Hello, Jane. Full of all people. Well, I've got some things to take care of. See you in a little bit, all right? Well, I thought you were away at school. I was, but some urgent business brought me back. I'm glad it did. Yeah. If I'd have known you'd look like this, I'd have been home a lot sooner. My gosh, Jane, you've gotten downright pretty. I'm just imagining things. Just the same as I've always been. Don't tell me. You are fine to differently. Isn't that the Winslow boy Jane is talking to? Quite a young scamp. Why, I thought, well, I'll put a stop to that. No, no, Hiram. It isn't going to do any harm for her to talk with him. Besides, it's undignified to create a scene. Well, perhaps you're right. But I'll give that young lady a talking to tonight. Oh, Hiram, I'm ashamed of you. After all, he's only a boy. But that makes no difference to me. He's still a Winslow. You know, Jane, now that I'm back, I don't see any reason why we shouldn't see each other once in a while. Do you? Well, of course not. You can see me anytime you want to, Freckle. Oh, that's great. How about tomorrow night? I can get Dad's car and... Hey, wait a minute. You certainly don't waste any time, do you? Is that what you learned in college? No, but I've got a lot of things on my mind. Things I want to talk to you about. Things like what, Freckle? Well, I got you down for a sea lection, Jane. Are you ready to favor us with it? I'll be right there. Fine and dandy. I'll make the announcement. Say, you remember how we used to sing together? Oh, yeah. Oh, no, you don't. You're not getting me up there. Attention, please, folks. We're now going to be entertained with a song by Miss Jane Potter. Slight correction. Looks like we're going to have a duet by Miss Potter and Freckles Winslow. Well, it's all over now, so you can relax. Yeah. Now, tell me what it was you wanted to talk to me about. Oh, well, do you think we could go outside? Well, of course. Who's the girl Freckles is singing with? That's Miss Jane Potter. Her dad owns the bank. Banker's daughter, huh? Yes, sir. Well, looks like Freckles is doing all right for himself. It don't mean nothing. That Mr. Potter is the tightest man I ever seen. I bet he got his first nickel he ever made, and he wouldn't turn it loose for nobody. Is that so? Yes, sir. All right, I'm all set. Now, tell me. Well, uh, I've never done anything like this before. I don't know just how to begin. Well, just say it as it comes to you. It's what I always do. Oh, it isn't as easy as all that. You see, this is kind of important. I know it's difficult, our families being the way they are, but you can talk to me. I'll understand. You will? Oh, well, it's about Danny. Danny? What's Danny got to do with it? Well, he's in quite a lot of trouble. What on earth has Danny's trouble got to do with us? Well, you see, your dad and my dad are road commissioners. Now, I thought if you'd put in a few good words. Is that all you had to tell me? Yes. I said it was important. What else is there to talk about? What else? I thought all the time I thought you... Freckles went home. You're the most selfish, contemptible... You're horrible, and I hope I never see you again. Well, what the... What's wrong with her? Well, there isn't anything wrong with her. I'm the one who's all haywire. Well, what'd you do? What'd you say to her? Apparently the wrong thing. Anyhow, you can forget that brilliant idea I had. It didn't work. What's the matter, boys? Something wrong? You'll never know. I wouldn't be too sure about that. Jeff just told me all about the mortgage and the highway you want to put through here. You know, I might be able to help you out on that little matter. What do you mean, help us out? Well, I've been investigating the situation. This town's got a lot of possibilities. If, as you say, you can bring the highway through. Yeah, it is. Now, suppose I tell you I think I can arrange it. What? Do you mean that? Not making any promises. I've got a friend in Chicago, a financier, as you might say. He's looking for a spot like this, make an investment. He is? No fooling? I'll get in touch with him right away. Boy! Mr. Quigley? Oh, this is Fairfield. Well, hello, Mr. Quigley. Glad to see you. How do you do, Leach? I got your wire this morning. Naturally. Oh, by the way, these are the two boys I wrote you about, Mr. Winklow and Mr. Doyle. Glad to know you, Mr. Quigley. How do you do? Mr. Leach has told me about the excellent business prospect in your community. Naturally, I'm open to any investment that looks profitable. I'm glad to feel that way, Mr. Quigley. Yeah, me too. Naturally. Well, shall we get down to business? Anytime you say. Oh, show Mr. Quigley's chauffeur to his room, will you, Jeff? Yes, sir. This way. Uh, you see, Mr. Quigley, it's like this. The only thing that keeps Fairfield from being a prosperous and progressive community is the fact that it's so far off the main highway. Uh, my name is Jeff. What's your appellation, if any? My title is Roxbury Barberstone Brown, the third. The third what? Well, that means I'm the third man by that name in my family. What's the matter? Ain't they got no imagination? All right, come on. This is it. I don't know. You know where I come from, we put it fuzzy. Is this the best you got? You either touched in the head or can't hear good. I told you this was it. It ain't nothing like what I been used to. I presume there's no giant in there. Yeah, just giant at 20 feet down the hall. Say, what is this you're contracting? Oh, this here? Yeah. Well, this is what us men of science call a gold machine. You don't say so. Well, what do it do, make gold? No, but it finds it awful quick. Now, let me show you something. Yeah. You see you turn that on now? Mm-hmm. Then you turn that like that, see? Mm-hmm. Ain't that pretty? Sure is. But where is the gold? Well, it must be around here somewhere. Of course, the machine says so. Lookie here. What did I tell you? Gold, look. Well, I do declare. Let me see that, boy. Let me see that. There it is. Oh, man, that ain't no gold. That's just a plain old ordinary common brass collar button. See, just goes to prove to you what I say. Even if it looks like gold. My, my, my. That sure is wonderful. Sure is. And it just happened to be for sale, too. Now, wait a minute, son. Wait a minute. You ain't trying to high pressure me, is you? Oh, man, do I look like a shady character? I'm stating the fact. Now, that's more like it. Because I ain't buying nothing from nobody. Except, first, I get the demonstration. What kind of demonstration? Well, a demonstration of is it good or is it ain't. And if it ain't? Then somebody ain't going to get a blood test with my reason. From what you've told me, unquestionably, the man for me to see first off is this banker. What's his name? Potter? Well, we can arrange that, all right. Well, that's settled. Well, sure. Freckles will take you over any time you're ready. Wait a minute, Daddy. You know how I stand in with the Potters. You think I stand in any better? Well, now, let's not argue about who's going to take who. The question is, do I see the man or don't I? All right, I'll take you. That's better. How soon? Right away, if you like. That's just me. Let's go. Hello, Jane. Well, of all the nerves. Now, wait a minute, Jane. Freckles went slow. We have nothing whatever to say to each other. I beg your pardon. Is this the charming young lady you were telling me about? Yeah, sure. This is Miss Potter, Mr. Quigley. How do you do, Mr. Quigley? I'm delighted, I assure you. Mr. Quigley came to see your father, Jane, on business. Oh. Well, won't you come in? Thank you. Good afternoon, Mr. Potter. You! What are you doing in my house? Now, you get out of here. Now, wait a minute, Mr. Potter. I'll not wait a minute. You get out of here. But, Daddy. Will you keep out of this? Mr. Potter, I only came... Young man, as I recall, I told you to get out of here. May I say a word, Mr. Potter? No. Who is this man? He's Mr. Quigley, Daddy. Well, he can't be much good associating with the Winslow. Get out of here, both of you. Oh, Mr. Quigley came here to... Funny business, I suppose. Quite the contrary, Mr. Potter. I came to talk to you about an investment I intend to make. Investment? Here? In Death East? Death East is a little different, isn't it? I'm sorry I flew off the handle that way. Won't you sit down? No, Mr. Potter. I'd like to. And you too, I suppose. And now, Mr. Quigley. What is this investment that you were contemplating? It's about real estate, Mr... I believe I was addressing Mr. Quigley. These matters are much better discussed on a full stomach, Mr. Quigley. Suppose you have dinner with us and we'll talk business after. Well, thank you, Mr. Potter. But I couldn't think of imposing on your hospitality like that. Oh, nonsense. Nonsense. There's always a place at my table for friends. Since you insist. Good, good. Now that's settled. Oh, Minerva. Minerva, my dear. Come here. Yes, dear. My goodness, Hyrum. Why didn't you tell me we had company? Hello, Mrs. Potter. Oh, how do you do, Freckle? My dear, this is Mr. Quigley, a friend of ours. My wife, Mrs. Potter. How do you do? I hope you'll excuse this awful old apron. Not at all, Mrs. Potter. To my mind, woman comes into a full radiance when attired in the mantle of the homemaker. Oh, isn't that sweet? Not bad. Not bad at all. Mr. Quigley's staying for dinner. Oh, how nice. Yes. And be sure to place one more plate on the table. Oh. Now that that's settled, if you'll excuse me, Mr. Quigley, I have some things to attend to. Certainly. I think my young daughter can keep you entertained until I get back, eh? I'll do my best. Just being with you will be quite enough, Mrs. Potter. Was there something else you wanted, young man? Well, Mr. Quigley and I, we... Oh, that's quite all right, Freckle. I think I have the situation pretty well in hand. Oh. Well, I guess there isn't much point in my hanging around. No, I guess not. Well, I'll be running along. Goodbye. Bye. See you later, Mr. Quigley. Yes, of course. Freckles is rather a nice young man, isn't he? Oh, yes, but he's such a boy. Women. Hey, you. Hey, Roxy, come in. Now, what do you want, boy? Can't you see I'm busy? Quiet, man. I want to talk to you. What's the matter with you? Is you crazy? Shh. Say, look. I got that gold machine back here in the back. Do you think I want somebody to steal it before I sell it to you? Now, now, now. Take it easy and recollect yourself, fish eyes. I done told you I ain't buying nothing from nobody. Steppin' first, he gives me a demonstration. Demonstration? I got it all rigged up for one just for you. That gold? For to find the gold? Well, then, what is we waiting on? Come on, son. Let's go get that gold. Now, shh. Wait a minute. This way. Well, there it is. That's it, all right. Now what? Now we find the gold. With that machine, huh? Mm-hmm. Say, how do you do that? Well, now, you press this little button. Yeah. Now, when you press it, that starts to detect it to working. Yeah. And when it starts to working, you see them two little balls there? Yeah. Now, this starts to going round and round. And if it goes to your left. Yeah. It ain't no good. We ain't gonna find nothing. But if it happens to turn to your right. Yeah. Look out, gold mine, here we come. Well, now, boy, ain't that something? Start pressing that button, son. My fingers is just itching to funnel that mizuma. Yeah. All right. Now, I press this button right there. Now, you hold right there. Yeah. See, now, turn it just like that. See? Turn a little. See that? Yeah. Come on. Gangway for the grave. That's right. Ooh, ooh, ooh. Wait a minute. Which way is it turning? It's turning to the right. To the right. Yeah. That mean we're done. Let's go. Yeah. Give me a shovel, boy, quick. I'm gonna start my digging right now. Now, ain't that a strange coincidence? I have a shovel right there. Now, move. Let me dig here. Right there? Yeah, that's it. You sure now, huh? Yeah. It's got to be there. There it is. That what is? The gold. Just like I told you. Ain't it pretty? Man, that ain't no gold. That's just a plain old common brick. Ain't you dumb? Ain't you never heard of a gold brick? Is that what that is? No. Let me see it. It's showing up. That's gold, all right. 14 carats, too. Now, wait a minute. How you know it's 14 carats? Can't you read? It's wrote right there. Well, I do declare. How much you say you want for that machine? Uh, would $50 be too much? Boy, you in like a duck. Yeah. Hey. Hey, yeah. Does all that belong to you? Sure do. And there's plenty more where that come from. You don't say. You wouldn't want to run that up a little bit, would you? Brother, you got yourself a playmate. Let him roll. I'm with you. I'll shoot that. Shoot. It's a crime to pass up a choice set up like this, Leach. These farmers are eating out of my hands. So is Potter's daughter, I notice. It's only part of the game. The whole family thinks I'm a big shot. Why, Potter's even calling a mass meeting to talk these bumpkins into floating a bond issue for that new highway. In a couple of months, we'll have every stamp in the county. Look, Quigley. The only reason I rang you in on this deal is because I need money, and I need it quick. I've got to get moving, and you know it. Now, how long is it going to take you to line up that bank and get to work? Oh, well, I reckon I'll be putting myself to bed. Hey, wait a minute, son. Where do you think you're going? Well, getting myself some shuteye. What do you think? Not in that bed, you ain't. I beg your pardon? If any shuteye be taken around here, you will take it in that bed, and not that one, because that is mine. What? Me sleep in that dinky little two-by-four? Unless you want to sleep on the floor. Well, man, that thing ain't big enough to hold a little old pygmy, much less an overblown adult like I am. Well, brother, you better start deflating yourself, because that's it. Go ahead, that's it. Hm, hm, hm. Man, this sure is humiliating. You know where I come from, why, the guess is always just the best bed. Ain't no guessing around here. I know who's going to get the best bed, and that's me. Now, go ahead and crawl in. Sleep tight. Yeah, don't you worry about that. In this yellow pack of bucks, there ain't no other way to sleep but tight. Uh, Roxy, hey, you don't snore, do you? Uh, not that I knows of. But, uh, I is inflicted with nightmares. Nightmares? What's them? Them ankle buzzers. You know, bad dreams that makes you want to do things in your sleep. Like what? Well, in my case, I used to be a barber. And I feel like I want to shave somebody. With a razor? Well, now, that all depends. Sometimes I use as a hatchet. Uh, but that, uh, results in awfully sloppy. Is that dangerous? Well, it is to the guy what's getting shaved. Particularly if he wake me up. And if he wake you up, then what? Then I'll start slashing. Good gracious me. What's that? Uh, is anything wrong? Are you kidding? I forgot to tell you that was a collapsical bed. Yes. Uh, thanks for forewarning. Now, ain't that a shame? Look like you got to sleep on the floor after all. Yeah, that's what you think, son. But I'm sleeping over there. No, you ain't. No. Now, wait a minute now, Moose Jaw. Fun is fun. But that bed is definitely a one man's proposition. Well, if it is, Moon Eyes, you is looking right at it. Because that's right where I'm sleeping. Now, I repeat myself again. No, you ain't. I sleep in that bed, and I does it solo. I strictly the lone wolf. Well, from now on, the lone wolf is going to sleep in pairs. On account of tonight, that bed is double or nothing. Who said it? I said it. Emphatically. Hey, what are you fixing to do? We're going to shoot these dice to who sleeps on the bed or on the floor. Oh, no, you ain't. You ruck-a-ducked me once today. You took my money, but you ain't going to take my bed. Well, how's we going to solve this problem? Now, there ain't but one way that I know of. How's that? First come, first served. That's what I'm saying. Look out, Matt. Look out or I'll get knifed. Next. Next? What do you mean next? This ain't no barbershop. Now, wait a minute now, Roxbury. What are you trying to do, give me a shave? I ain't said nothing about shaving nobody. I'm fixing to carve me a turkey. Carve you a turkey? This ain't Thanksgiving. To me it is. Yeah, but wait, I ain't no turkey. Now, wait a minute, son. You mean to tell me I don't know a turkey when I see one? Now, go ahead now, Roxbury. Roxbury, wait a minute now. Watch what you're doing with that razor. This is me. This is Jeff. I ain't no turkey. This is Jeff. Don't know no turkey named Jeff. You don't? Well, now hold that razor. Now, shut up. Shut up, turkey. Don't you know it ain't polite for a poultry to talk when they're about to get carved? Now, wait a minute, Roxbury. Watch what you're doing with that razor. First off, I think I'll cut me some dark meat. Dark meat? Now, wait a minute now. You've taken in too much territory. Hey, what's this? Well, well. The part that goes over the fence last. I think I'll take me a portion of that. Now, wait a minute, Roxbury. What? Wait a minute. Now, Roxbury. Come here for a minute. What brings the meat? What is the matter? Now, what's all the racket? Ain't you got no respect for a man who's trying to sleep? You know what you done done. You done woke me up just as I was fixing to get the best turkey dinner I've had in months. Is you telling me. Lots of bombs. You'll have to fight till it hurts. But I know that you'll all agree that it's worth it to see Fairfield become the thriving little metropolis that it deserves to be. Now, in a few minutes, our attendants will pass among you with subscription blanks. I want you all to sign up for whatever you can afford. And I hope you can all afford the limit. Thank you. Hello, Freggles. Mr. Winslow. Evening. Hello. I suppose we can count on your help in this campaign, Mr. Winslow. I never sponsored anything Potter was behind yet. And I don't intend to start now. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. However, if the folks around here want it bad enough, I'm willing to sign the highway permit. Nothing more. Well, I'd say that's fair enough, Mr. Winslow. Freggles? I can't make up my mind whether I like that fellow or not. Well, I can. He's too smooth to suit me. Howdy, Mr. Winslow. Say, Freggles, have you seen the subscription blanks? Folks want to sign the bonds. I can't find them nowhere. Ask Mr. Leach. He's handling all the subscriptions. Oh, I've been looking for him, but he ain't no where he's around. Must have gone out. Well, he's got them up in his room. OK, I'll go get them for you. Well, make it snappy. Folks is waiting. Jeff, you got a passkey to the rooms up there? Sure. Well, let me into Mr. Leach's room, will you? Yes, sir. I want to get the subscription blanks. Folks, I'm sorry, but we seem to have misplaced the subscription blanks. So while we're waiting, we'll have a little music. Yes, sir. I'll have it open for you in a jiffy. Chief. What's the matter? Uh, Mr. Freggles, I pay you? What are you talking about? Is he in there? He's in there, but he don't look so healthy. Oh, come on. Come on. He's dead. Dead? That's all I wanted to know. Let me out of here. Come on now, Mr. Freggles. Let me out of here. Jeff, don't tell anybody about this, understand? Tell anybody? I don't want to even think of it. Oh, this is awful. Jeff, we've got to do something quick. Yeah, right. Look, you stand guard while I go get Constable Weaver. Who, me? Stay here with that fugitive from the mall? No, sir. Not me. Well, you got it. It'll only be a minute. That's still too long. Nobody's going to hurt you. Did anybody tell him that? Uh, Mr. Freggles, what is he doing with that key? Well, I locked the door. Locked the door? And leave me in here with that corpse? Certainly. Suppose the murderer comes back? Oh, well, if he do, that's all. What? Wait a minute. Hey, hey, Mr. Freggles. Come back. I can't stand it. I'm allergic to corpse. Now, come on, Mr. Freggles. Come on. He's always complaining about something. No matter what I do, nothing ain't right for him. What's the matter? Couldn't you find him? What? Where is he? Upstairs. Things like this can ruin a man's whole evening. That's what we get for allowing strangers in town. Ain't no way out of this tomb. I don't believe in spooks. Mr. Freggles. The murderer coming back to do his carving. No, you don't. Open her up. Stand right where you are. Where is everybody? Whoa! Put him up. What are you talking about? You heard me. Put him up. I ain't done nothing, mister. I ain't no murderer. They turn him to the scene of your crime, huh? He didn't have anything to do with the constable. He was with me when I found him. Oh. Well, where's the body? Whoa! Don't try anything clever. You're dealing with the law now. Quarter in a well digger's ear. Knife in the back. Just what I thought. Suicide. A man identified as Jack Muggsy Leach, well-known local gangster, was found murdered last night in a hotel room in Fairfield, Indiana, where he is believed to have been hiding from the police. As yet, no clues have been discovered which might lead to the identity of the murderer. He couldn't have been hid out very well if they found him that easy. Maybe one of the boys followed him. Yeah, I wonder who did it. Search me. Well, maybe we'd better find out. You know, that's what I was thinking. What'd you say the name of that town was? Fairfield, Indiana. After all, constable, don't you think you're going things just a little too far? Not by a jugful, I ain't. I don't know how they figure things where you come from, young fella, but murder's a pretty serious offense in these parts. I thought you said it was suicide. Well, man's got a right to change his mind, ain't he? Murder, that's what it was, and I'm staying right here until I calculate who done it. Heavens, you don't think I did it? I ain't saying no, and I ain't saying yes, Minervy. But to my mind, everybody's guilty until they've proved something else. I read that in a book. This is preposterous. Do I look like I'd stab a man in the back? Hard to tell what you'd do, Hiram, if you figured the fella had something you wanted. You'll regret that remark next election, Caleb Weaver. I'm sorry, Hiram, but a man carving a career for himself like me has got to be ruthless now and again. A gentleman bickering like this isn't going to settle things for anybody. Say, I think you got something there, young fella. Jeff? You mean me? That was a butcher knife he was stuck with. Reckon it could have come from your kitchen? Don't look at me. I ain't done nothing. But you do know how to use a butcher knife, don't you? No, sir. I'm strictly a razor man. Look, Constable, I told you he had nothing to do with it. He was with me when I found the body. Ah, that don't mean nothing. And come to think of it, how do I know you didn't kill him? Why would I kill a total stranger? Aha! Trapped you, didn't I? What do you mean, trap me? You said he was a stranger, and I know you brung him into town and passed him off as a friend of yours. Explain that. Oh, I met him on the bus. So you said. My son wouldn't do a thing like that, and you know it, Caleb. Oh, he wouldn't, eh? That young whippersnapper'd do anything. He's a wild one, he is. He's never done a wild thing in his life. Oh, no? What about that Halloween when him and Danny Doyle put my best milker, Isabelle, up on the top of Dave Milton's barn? She had the pit for weeks. Childish pranks. Not to my way of thinking. They're just two ornery kids, that's all. I have a good mind to arrest them on general principle. You're crazy. Who said that? Look, Constable, while you're so keen about making an arrest, why don't you take a look at the one man here who might have had a motive for the murder? Motive? Yes, motive. We know that Leach was a gangster. How do we know that the man he's sent for isn't a gangster, too? Yes, I mean you, Quigley. Freckles Winslow, how can you say a thing like that about Mr. Quigley while you hardly know him? That's exactly the point. Who is he? Where did he come from? Obviously, our young friend is allowing his personal feelings to influence his better judgment. My personal feelings haven't anything to do with it. I can vouch for Mr. Quigley, Constable. I've investigated his character and he's entirely above reproach. Uh-huh, trying to shift the blame on somebody else, huh? Uh, pardon me, but the hotel's closed. You'll have to wait until the investigation's over. Are you in charge here? Well, I'm a constable, if that's what you mean. Who might you be? We're from the FBI. Oh, gee, fella, huh? We're down here to find out who killed Jack Leach. Well, if you come here to help me on this investigation, I don't need any. I'll have this... You just keep quiet and sit down, Pop. We're taking over now. Now, you... You heard him. Sit down. Ahem. I'm, uh, Hiram Potter, officer, president of Fairfield State Bank. If there's anything I can do... If we need you, we'll let you know. Yes, yes, of course. Hello, Nate. Hello, boys. A little far from home, ain't you? I'm down here in a business deal. Business deal, huh? With Leach? No, I... I can vouch for it. I told you, if I want anything out of you, I'll ask for it. Hiram, I always told you you talk too much. Well, I can tell you how he happens to be here. Leach sent for him. Oh, he did. You know, Quigley, I think we ought to have a little talk, private. There's nothing I have to say that I can't say right here. We'll be the judge of that. Come on, Nate. Where are we going? Not far. Just out on the porch. You keep this front covered. See that no one leaves the room. You don't have to tell me what to do. I've been constable of this township for 20 years. Now, anybody who tries anything funny like making a getaway is going to hear from me. Now, look, boys, you're off on the wrong foot. I didn't kill Leach. We were friends. If you didn't kill him, who did? I don't know. We were here together on a deal to crack the local bank. But I didn't kill him. You've got to believe that. We don't, but keep talking. You don't think that I'd knock him off the floor It's too much for one man. Wait a minute. We can still do it. That bank is just crammed with dough. All we've got to do is take it. You understand? We might be. Okay. But we're still not forgetting what we came for. Now, here's the setup. Don't you think you'd better look outside and see what's going on? Oh, no, you don't. You don't trick me to get me out of the way. You heard what that officer said. He wants to talk in private. Officers? How do you know they're officers? Wouldn't surprise me if the whole bunch of them were crooks. Preposterous. You noticed they knew him right away, didn't you? If there isn't something fishy going on, why do they want to talk to him alone like that? Freckles Winslow, you make me sick. Just because you don't like Mr. Quigley, you think he's a crook and a murderer. All I said was... I don't care what you said. I think Mr. Quigley's a nice man. Thank you, Miss Potter. Hey, you know what this young upstart was saying? Says he don't believe you're police officers. That you're just a bunch of crooks. Ain't that a heartless... Very funny, kid. You got any more like that? All right, I said it. So what? Well, don't worry about it. We think it's a good joke. Don't we, Nate? Yeah, sure. Well, it appears to me like you just got things pretty well straightened out, huh? That's right. But Mr. Quigley's opened our eyes in lots of ways. Yes, as a matter of fact, he's volunteered to stay right here with us until we finish the job. Any? Yes, of course. Well, young man, this should dispel any doubt you have about Mr. Quigley. I presume this interview is at an end? Yes, you can go. But don't anybody try to leave town. We might want to talk to you again. Hey, ain't you going to arrest nobody? Where would you put them if we did? Well, yeah. But you might keep your eye on these two just in case they get any more funny ideas. You can depend on me. I'll watch them all right. Yes, sir. Mr. Quigley, are you going to have dinner with us this evening? Thank you, Mrs. Potter. I'd love to, but I'm afraid perhaps I'd better stay with these gentlemen. You understand. Oh, of course. Well, some other time. Yes, ma'am. Come, James. Goodbye, Mr. Quigley. Good day. Tell me, son. I'll be home in a little while yet. I want to talk to Danny. Come on, Jeff. Let's get back to work. Yes, sir. Don't worry. We're not going to run away. And I'll take care of your dog. You heard my orders. Just a moment, Walleyes. I've created some worries with you. Oh, go away, Roxbury. Don't you see I'm all tied up? Boy, you ain't near tied up as you're going to be when I get to be with you. What's the trouble with you? Come on. Get in here. Come on. Wait a minute, man. What is the matter with you? Get in here. What is the matter with you? What's the matter? You see this? Well, this ain't no gold brick. It's just a plain, ordinary old red brick with gold plating on it. That's all. Well, I do declare. How do you know that? Because I've been polishing some of the plating off that house. Now, ain't that something? Well, what are you telling me about it? You found the brick, not me. Uh-uh. Hold that. The gold machine found the brick. That's right. It sure did. Therefore, that ain't no gold machine. It's a brick machine. And ain't nobody never got rich finding no brick. 251, 252, and a nickel for my milk bottle will make 257. Phew. Boy, am I in a pickle now. What in the dickens are you doing? Oh, Mr. Danny, things is bad. No matter how I figure, my total asset only comes to $2.57. That includes my best rabbit foot that I sold to Cindy Hippert Thomas for a dollar easy. Well, why the hype and ants all of a sudden? Oh, Mr. Freckles, you is now looking at a man under a dark cloud. Who ain't? This ain't no pigment of imagination. This is business. You know that gold machine that I sold Roxbury? How could I forget it? Well, he done brung it back. Oh, I don't blame you for moaning. Now, wait a minute. You gonna hear some real moaning. And the $50 that he paid me for the machine, he wants it back. And I can't give it back to him because he took it away from me in a basket. And old Roxbury don't fool. He told me he was gonna stay right on my neck until I gave him that money. And if I didn't? Don't worry, Jeff. You've got company. Old Picklepuss is camped on our necks, but good. You said it. If we could shake this, old dodo, I bet we could find out a few things. I still think Quigley and those two mugs are nothing but crooks. No, you don't. I know what you was doing, plotting, that's what. You talk so tight and listener don't talk at all. You're goofy. Goofy, huh? Don't you get gay with me, young father. What is this? Any messages to be took away? I know you took them. You said it. Hello? Principal Weaver speaking. Yes, yes, I got you. I'll go and pick up Mr. Potter and get right over there. Yes, goodbye. That was for me. That takes care of him and Potter. As soon as they're out of town we can go to work. I got some important business to take care of and you fellas stay right here. And don't try nothing until I get back. Let's get started. Now's our chance. With him out of the way maybe we can find out a few things. Come on. It's Mr. Quigley and the cop. Oh, they're gonna rob the bank. Nothing else but. I knew I was right about that Quigley. Well, what do we do? We gotta stop him. Danny, barge up to Potter's house as fast as you can before he and the constable can get away. Jeff, you go scout up the car so we can follow him. We? You know I ain't gonna follow no bank robbers. Do as you're told. I'll disconnect the distributor so they can't stop that car. Now hurry up. Jane, is your dad and the constable left yet? Yes, they left just a few minutes ago. Why, what's the matter? What's the matter? Quigley and his pals are robbing the bank. Robbing the bank? I don't believe it. It's a fact. I saw them with my own eyes. Well, I gotta get back to Freckles. Wait a minute. Jeff, not here, you fool. Back up the street where they can't see us. I can't stop him, Mr. Freckles. Step on it again. Give it here. Okay, Quigley. See you later. Wait a minute. You're not leaving me here. Here, let me try it. Too bad you had the key turned off. You know, I forgot I turned it off when... Did you hear what I heard? Sounded like shots. I'm gonna get out of here. Come back here, you crazy? I'm crazy like a fox. Let me out of here. Come here. Now we're in for it. Here they come. One of your funny stuff, huh? All right, smart boy. Start driving. Get out of town and keep going. Yes, sir. And keep bearing down on that throttle. Uh, Mr. Freckles. Stop the car. I got to get out of here. Keep away from that brake. What's the matter with you, Popeyes? I just remembered that I got to go back to the hotel. I forgot to put the cat out. Yeah, well, pipe down or I'll put you out like a light. I told you to be careful. All right, get out. Gosh, all fishhooks. It's the G-Fellas. Put down those guns. Daddy! How we doing? Keep them up. Nice work, boys. I congratulate you. I knew right off they was crooks the whole caboodle of them. I always say, give them enough rope and they'll hang somebody. Are you all right, son? Sure, I'm okay, Dad. You should be proud of that son of yours, Winslow. I just found out about these men. They're criminals with a reward on their heads. A reward? No kidding? That's right, and it all goes to you and Freckles. Holy cow, now we can pay off that mortgage. And we can get that highway. That is, if the two road commissioners can get together and sign the permit. I don't see any reason why not. How about it, Winslow? There's nothing I'd like better. Hey, um, what am I going to do with them? Take them to the country seat. Oh, oh, sure. Come on. What happened, Winslow? Where's that money you owe me? Now, wait a minute now, Mr. Rockenberry. What about the extinction? I done changed my mind. Either you pays up right now, I'm going to make you eat this machine piece by piece. Now, wait a minute, Rockenberry. I ain't hungry now. All right, I'm all set. Now, tell me. Well, I... I've never done anything like this before. I... I don't know just how to begin. Well, just say it as it comes to you. That's what I always do. Yeah? Yeah. Now, wait a minute now, Rock. Piece by piece. Right here. Here. Now, piece by piece. Here.