Let's Get Tough! | East Side Kids | Leo Gorcey | Classic Comedy Film

♪♪ Okay, boys, we've seen enough. Come on. Why, where are we going? We're going to clean up on some Japs. You talk like he was a General MacArthur. The day out of Japan, that General will fight them to a standstill. Yeah, you're not kidding, so long as he's got help. He'll have plenty of help because we're joining the Army. Oh, no, not me. I personally like the Navy. My old man used to be waterboy for Corporal Dodger. Say, listen, how are we going to join the Army? None of us are old enough. Just because you can't tell a little white lie, there's no reason why the rest of us can't. Follow your father's registration. I love you like you love my own son. All right, report at that address. We want to knock off about a million Japs. Who's we? We is us, six of us. You mean you want to enlist? Yeah, that's a general idea. We want to learn Yokohama to yodel the Star Spangled Banner. How old are you, son? Twenty-one. How old are the rest of you boys? Twenty-one. You'll have to have proof of your age. Proof? Feel these bristles. And I just shaved this morning, too. Yeah, honest, you got to believe us. We want to fight. The Japs don't ask you how old you are when they start dropping those bombs on you. Well, orders is orders. Tell that to the Marines. Okay, but you'll be sorry, kid. Opportunity only knocks once. I got a lot of connections with the Boy Scouts. I'll fix you. One ninety-two and a half. I lost four pounds. Oh, that's bad money. Where are your birth certificates? Oh, they got burnt in a very severe fire. Yeah, but we admit we're twenty-one. We got muscles and red... Well, you've got the right spirit, fellas, but I'm afraid you're too young to enlist. Can't say we didn't try. What are you in this for? So long, Cap. Doesn't anybody want it? Have a cigar, Admiral. Why, thanks. Hey, show us a couple of uniforms, will ya? What do you kids want? We want to join the Navy. You want to join the Navy? What for? We want to share the ocean with Japan. You want to do what? We want to share the ocean with Japan. What do you mean with Japan? We'll take the top and give them the bottom. Oh. I don't feel so good. I'm getting seasick already. Funny. Me too. What's the matter with you guys? Didn't you ever smoke a cigar before? Who's Rockets' office? Come on out. Not here. Come on out. Save a voice for me, will ya, Admiral? We'll be back in a few minutes or maybe a few days. Out. You filthy swine. Well, what do you know about that? Happy little chaps, those Japanese. I got a good mind to report him to the alien department. I wonder what he ran Heinbach out of the store for. I don't know. He's a good American citizen. What are we, mice or men? Let's see. Gee, I'm sorry. I didn't know my aim was better. You're blind as a bat. For a fearless front in the face of danger. Man, that's the man that went down my ribs. Hey, don't get him mad. What do you boys want? We don't like you and we don't like your store. You're no gentleman, Kino. What's the idea of chasing a good American like Heinbach out of your store? Heinbach's no good American. He's not, huh? I suppose you're a sweet-smelling lotus blossom, is that it? You get out. We'll get out. We'll tear you up into little pieces and feed you to that Chinaman for chop suey. Or maybe he's too yellow to make good chop suey. Look out. Don't run. Don't run. Stay there. Boy, the Battle of Bull Run had nothing on that. I told him from Tokyo we can't do that to him. He'll murder him. Yeah, he sneaked up on us. Sure. Lead on, General. Hey, wait a minute. We shouldn't do nothing like that. We don't belong to the Army or the Navy or nothing. It's open season on Jack. Yeah, but he's only one of them. Maybe we can get a bunch of them. Yeah, about 50 million of them. That's our dish. Sure. We've got to remember Pearl Harbor. Anything wrong, boys? Hiya, pops. No, nothing at all. We was just practicing war games. Anti-aircraft. Yeah, we're having a scavenger hunt. Everybody's got to bring something useless to the party. I'm bringing him. All right, honey. Put that stuff back where you got it. That's vitamins for victory. Come on. Put it back. Okay, but we was just trying to be patriotic. And you, Danny, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. With your brother Phil in the service, making the whole neighborhood proud of him. You ought to know better than this. I told him we shouldn't. Hiya, Nora, honey. Hey, Phil, you're not in uniform. Well, what's the difference? Isn't the uniform makes the man? No, but you should be proud to wear it. Oh, now, look, don't tell me you're like the rest of the gals in love with a uniform. Oh, Phil, you know better than that. Ease away, sailor. There's a storm coming. Hiya, Danny. Hiya, Phil. Hey, how come you're here? I thought you were in Annapolis. Well, you never can tell what I'm going to do. You seem to do all right with the girls. Why, uh... Hey, Danny, what's up? These hoolims trying to lead you into trouble? Sure. We just had your dull little brother to a burlesque show. Don't worry. Our skirts are clean. Yeah, clean our skirts, too. Come on, we gotta have a conference. Hey, I gotta take a lesson. I'll see you later, Phil. Hey, Danny, tell Mom I'll see her tonight, but it may be late. Okay. Hi, Jigsaw. Oh, honey, I'm sorry, I can't. I've got a very important matter I've got to take care of. But I'm coming back to take care of tonight, so be prepared. It's a date. I'm ready, Professor. You are? Take it on two. Pardon me, pardon me, just a minute. Skip the page. Take it on two. What's he learning? Barnyard imitations? He should learn boogie-woogie, if you ask me. Boy, is he sure. Come on. He should learn to play a harp. A harp? He should just quit. Hours and hours, huh? Yeah, hours and hours. Professor, your shoe, your shoe. That's your shoe. It's your shoe. What's the, Professor? Professor, your finger's caught, your finger's caught. Yeah, I'm stuck. A little nervous tonight. Prince. Yeah? Should I change my name to Misha? We wouldn't miss you if you did. Who said that? Who said that? Professor, will you play for me? Come on, Professor, play for me. I'll choose you who plays. Come on, I'll choose you. No, no, no, no, no, no. Come on, I'll choose you. I'll choose you. Come on, once. Just once. Choose me once. Don't tell anybody. You win. Take the other lesson, will you? The good lesson. That's the most murderous interpretation of music I ever heard. I want to talk with you. Come here. Well, what's the use of arguing? They won't let us enlist, and that's that. Yeah, and I have my mind made up to pick off a million Japs. We can still take care of Keno. I don't know. That thing he pulled out of that cane wasn't no pocket knife. We'll attack him on his flank. Flank. That means you come up on his rear, that's right. That's what I said. Yeah, surprise attack. Let's do it. You really do? Say, you guys sure this is Keno's store? Sure. Can't you smell the cherry scent? The only thing I ever did with a scent was spend it. All in one place? Hey, made in Japan. No kidding. He don't look like he's asleep. Maybe he fainted. Hey, Keno. He's been stabbed. Mama never told me to stop playing with you white boys. Hey, let's get out of here. We'll be playing for it. Hey, Pop Stevens, let me out of here. Stuck himself with his own stabbing knife. I don't get it. No, we'll all get it and get plenty if anybody finds out we were there tonight. Yeah, it was as dark as the top of Scuno's head. That old lady ain't got second sight. What are you guys worrying about? Who's worrying? But I'd sure feel a lot better if I knew Pop Stevens didn't see us. Yeah, if anybody's got second sight, he has. That's the only thing that cop ever discovered was his lunch box. And somebody once stole that. Yeah, a guy can be locked up for that. Boys, I need glasses. Oh, oh. Hello, Pop. Good evening, Mr. Stevens. Sorry to intrude, boys, but I'm taking you over to the station. What for? We didn't do nothing. We've been here all evening. Yeah, except when you were in Keno's store. Well, uh, you got us up and enough for our rest? Well, I'm not exactly arresting you. I just want to talk to you. Come on. Oh, that's different. Bring a card, boys. Hey, uh, Scuno, we'll be over to the door, will you? Why don't we have a beer? Can't believe it. Yeah, he wouldn't even believe Ripley. All right, maybe you didn't kill him, but I'll find out. Murphy, leave him locked in here for a while. Wait outside in the hall. Yes, sir. Man, I'm sweating already. Hot water and a cooler? No, but we's in the cooler. And hot water, too. Hey, fellas. No kidding, we're in an awful jam. They got enough evidence pointing towards us to fry us, but good. Oh, when will we smell anything like fried chicken? You know, I heard sometimes they sweat guys into saying things they never did. Eh, that's only in books. I hope. Got mighty thick bars on these windows. Stand by. Good night. Radio Tokyo, signing off. Amaro. Hello, Phil. Hiya, Joe. How are ya, Joe? Tokyo just announced the complete destruction of Los Angeles, Detroit, and Berlin. I mean Boston. And the American press is afraid to release it. Democracies, they won't be here much longer. Prince tells me you are no longer in the service. That you have been dishonorably... Skip it. When do we go to work? Soon. But we must proceed cautiously. Okay, okay. But how about some dough? Sure. Consider this a slight advance. There will be more. Much more. When we have accomplished our mission. Ah, this is more like it. Dough, real dough. Hey, get a load of this. Article 5. Criminal Proceedings Condemnation of Property. Get away from there a minute. No person shall be held to answer for a capital or otherwise infamous crime unless on a presentment or indictment of a grand jury. Well, I guess we got our rights, huh? Sure, according to that they can't even hold us here. We're American citizens, what are we waiting for? Let's go. Let's cut out of here. Hey, Murphy! Come on, hurry up. Quiet, quiet. Watch the deed. You ever read the Bill of Rights? Certainly, not by heart. Get out of my way, O'Hara, I'm leaving. Get back. Get back, I'll spank every one of you. What's the matter, boys? You know you gotta have a corpse to let us to keep us here. He's not gonna make a corpse out of me. That's right, Mr. Stevens. We just read the Bill of Rights and according to that you have no right to hold us. You're right, Danny. The police have no legal right to hold you. Are you kidding? My time's valuable. You boys are lucky. You're citizens of the United States and you're entitled to all the protection under that Bill of Rights. That's why the police are turning you free because I don't think we have sufficient evidence to indict you. You mean I can go? You can go. Who? Down our place sometime we'll have a nice third degree picnic. Just a minute. I also want to point out that under that Bill of Rights you were wrong in taking the law in your own hands trying to punish Keno. Yeah, but he was a Jap. For your information, he was not a Jap. He was Chinese. Chinese? Yeah. How do you know? We really pulled a boner. And a good one. Well, thanks for telling us. Chinese? I thought you might want to see this. Father was murdered. It's no use crying over spilt milk. We made a mistake, that's all. Ah, we're a bunch of saps. Well, let's quash being saps. Let's try to do something useful for a change. Yeah, you know, we ought to pay for... Anybody got any dough? Not me. Hey, you got some, ain't you, Glimpy? I could open a bank account. Moolah! Get him! Left a frame. Like you hang your heart in your sleeve? Easy now. Where are we going? Heaven. Movie. Dinner at Sano's and I know a new job, fellas. That sounds exciting. When do you have to report for duty? Oh, any time. That sounds awfully in-depth. And all of it is. We'll have dinner at the Auto-Man. Now, look, Nora, I'm sorry, but we're going to have a porterhouse steak at Sano's. It's defense dance and the Auto-Man. Ah, Sano's. It's defense dance and the Auto-Man. Ah, Sano's. The Auto-Man. Ah, Sano's. Nora, where might you be going? Hiya, Pop. Phil and I are going to make a night of it. He has a furlough. Furlough. He's got a nerve if he told you that. Oh, now, wait a minute, Pop. Anything I got to tell Nora is my own business. I had a feeling there was something wrong. You might as well tell me, Phil. Well, there's plenty of time to talk later. Come on, let's go. Wait a minute. You're getting out right now. Nora, don't pay any attention to that. You know, newspapers and how they get things mixed up. Who are you about? Figure it any way you want, kid. Come on, give me the lowdown. Aren't you in the Navy? No, I'm not, and I'm glad I'm out of it. Well, what do you know? So Phil turned out to be a saboteur. Hold it there. Hold it. You know, Glimpy's got to have his little choke. Yeah, I'll choke him right in the puss if he ever makes a crack like that again. Feel sorry for him? Nora, I'm sorry I had to blast Phil like that. What in the world has come over him? What would make him do a thing like that? You got me. It's just one of those things you can't explain. Forget him. Don't worry. I will. That will be three dollars. Only three dollars for all that stuff? Sure. Okay, we'll take it. How would you like a nice strat of a serious violin? Well, I got to see it first. Oh, Martin, you got enough stuff with taking my career away? Ah, you act like a mother with an only child. Oh, and next week I was going to play Carnegie Hall. Look at that piece of mahogany. How do you like that? It works. How much? I give you four dollars. Four dollars? Sure. Ain't you got no compassion for the human race? We're working for a great cause. Come on, make it ten bucks. Be a nice guy. Well, I give you four dollars and fifty cents and that's all. So, that's enough. Let's go. Come on, grease my palm. You kids are getting a good bargain. Oh, yeah, yeah. You get bargains like a cow gives buck beer. Hey, Heinbach, what's that chap doing in the back room? Chap in the back room? You're making a mistake. You are seeing things. Maybe. I'm sorry. Come on. Well, so long, Santa Claus. Don't give nothing away. Hey, do cows give buck beer? I don't know. It's a thing that's strictly arbitrary. Hey, what's the monkey stuff for? I think my eyes are going screwy. I'm sure... No, I don't think so. Those kids saw you. It is dangerous for you to be coming here. You must be more careful next time. But... Go ahead, Monks. You're the speech maker. Good morning, Mrs. Kino. Good morning. Just brought the fellas over to tell you how sorry we are about what happened to your husband. Yeah. It cost three bucks. Look what you've done. Can't you ever learn no ethics? Oh, can I help it if I'm touched? Oh, don't cry, Mrs. Kino. All right. I mean no... Too bad now. We got some money here. Thought maybe we could pay for some of those things we broke. No, no. No take. Well, you gotta take it. We feel as though we owe it to your husband. He was a swell guy. Maybe you know who killed my husband, yes? Only if we knew, Mrs. Kino. Yeah, the police will find out. I'm so sorry. It was two dollars. Will you give me a receipt, please? That's the guy I saw in the back room at Heimbach's. All right, I'll give you change. Did you see that? Thank you. Hey! I just want to shake hands with an honest man. Thank you. You're a man after my own heart. Good day, gentlemen. Jeff, huh? Do you know him? No, I've never seen him before. That's a funny thing. Well, come on, fellas. We gotta mosey along. Take it easy, Mrs. Kino. We'll see you later. Goodbye, Mrs. Kino. Jeff. Down in the back room. In the music box. Good. Everything is going just as we planned. We have nothing to worry about. Let's get out of here. Bye, Mrs. Kino. You're appreciated. And flowers. That was a beautiful gift. You know, it almost broke my heart. Thank you. I'll pay you in the morning. For a souvenir. Yeah, you give me a paint. All right, we need a pen anyway. Use it to take the minutes of the meeting. Friday the 13th. We try to drown O'Leary's cat. That's broke. Hey, there's something in here. Maybe it's gold. A piece of paper. Give me that blockhead. It ain't nothing. It's just a blank piece of paper. Let me see it. It's a right nub. What are you talking about? You put it in coffee or milk. Who ever heard of dunking a piece of paper? Hey, let me see that piece of paper. Who's got a match? What do you think I am, an arsonist? It's a little trick I learned in college one time. Correspondence course. Yeah? Yeah, you go to college? What did you learn how to write? Maybe that's why the chap was so anxious to get a hold of it. Maybe that's why he paid the two bucks just as a start. Figuring comes awful slow to some guys. Keep on trying. I think that guy's a five car. That's the smartest thing you've said yet. Boys, we're going to pay our friendship. Pay it, you four. Oh, you're fighting. Relax. Yeah, you're a Chinaman. We love Chinamans. You're our friend. Sure. You've always made me lots of trouble. No, that's all over with. We're both on the same side. I was going to get a Frenchman. So long, Charlie. If anybody bothers you, just let us know. We'll help you out. Come on, Charlie. I better go in alone. Old Matsui might get scared. Really do. Good morning, Matsui. How's your health? Very good. I trust that your honorable health is excellent, young man. My health is slowly depreciating and I'm very dishonorable. But I want to thank my venerable forefathers that I'm able and well to walk into your worthy tea shop on this sunny day. How am I doing? You're good, fine. What's up with your precious sleeve? Well, it's nothing up my sleeve, but I got a lot on my mind. I'd like you to interpret for me. Of course, if I can. Read that. Let me see it closer. Uh-uh. No dicky, no touchy. What did you get there? You just mind your business and read it, that's all. Well, are you going to read it or not? Hey, wait a minute there, shorty. Not so fast. Give me that note. I'm going to tear your arm off. You know that stealing? A little note and I'll put it on your fucking head. Hey. Why does this always have to happen when we're around? I don't know, but I'm cutting out now. Hey, what's the idea of crashing in here like this? We've got to talk to you, Mr. Stevens. Well, all right, but make it snappy. What is it? Somebody else murdered? Suicide. Yeah, yeah. It's old man Matsui in a tea shop down by the river. And we didn't do it. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Start at the beginning. If you ask me, it all ties in slick as anything with a big spy ring that's operating around here. Oh, you think so? I'm sure of it. Hey, Mark, something about that Jefferson. Will you shut up, Big Mud? First of all, we want the hang back, see? Don't take it so hard, Joe. Hey, Joe. What's the matter? Anything wrong? My father just committed hairy carry. Oh. Well, it could make him do a thing like that. I don't know. I wish I knew. Well, we'd better start being more careful from here on in. You know those cops aren't dummies. I'll know how to take care of them. And all of a sudden, the old chap pulls out a pig sticker and gets himself the worst. Sure he was dead. Dead as our friend Keno, if not deader. No jive. By the way, how come everybody took old Keno for a chap when he was Chinese? Well, maybe he was acting as a spy for his country. You guessed it, Danny. I think I'll pay a visit to that tea house. Oh, now we're talking. Yeah. Well, let's go. But I stay here, maybe? Hey, I gotta talk to you. What is he, going to a fire or coming from one? No, he's like that. He's always rushing someplace. Come on. Is there something I can do for you? Hey, you're not alive. I beg your pardon. I'm very much alive. Were these boys in here a little while ago? I believe they were. You believe we was? I saw you with my own eyes. You stabbed yourself to death. Wait a minute. Did you have any trouble with them? Possible. Nothing serious, though. These boys were just playful. If that was play, give me work the rest of my days. I'm telling you, Poppy was dead as a doornail. So Pop takes his word against us. It's a pretty good trick if you can do it. The next time you kids take me on a wild goose chase, I'm going to turn you over my knee and spike you. Every one of you. Well, what do you think of that? Looks mighty wacky to me. Maybe he's done it with mirrors. There's something wrong. Oh, please, fellas. My headache. You were right, Tojo. The policeman came. He didn't suspect? No. My poor honorable father. He felt that I had disgraced him. You go watch the store. All right. I still think we're wasting our time. Just the same. I'm going to take another look. Hey, Shorty, where's Matsui? Oh, he not here. We was just talking to him a few minutes ago. Where'd he go? Oh, Mr. Matsui go out a little bit. He meant a business. Business, huh? There's some mighty funny business going on around here. Ah, forget it, will you, fellas? Who are you? I'm Mr. Matsui's honorable cousin. Oh, yeah? You're Matsui's cousin like I got a hole in my head. Come on, tell us where he went and we'll let you off easy. How should I know? I'm not his keeper. Maybe so, but I think you're lying. You're a very brave young fellow with all your friends here. Yeah, go ahead. Step outside, fellas. I want to take care of this. Oh, no. I don't want to fight. No, not unless you got ten to one on your side. Maybe we better go before I lose my temper and beat his head in. Come on. Don't forget to keep your rice dry. Something smells. Yeah, and it ain't cherry blossoms. Whatever it is, we're going to find out. Guess a lot of J.G., huh? Junior G men. Hey, now there's an idea. They won't let us enlist, so maybe we can help out like that. The way I see it, there's a big spy ring operating around here, and we got to put the finger on it. Hey, fellas, look what I found. Well, it's going to be the grabber. If that's tea, I'm going to ditch it. It might be poison. Look, in the first place, it's not tea. The second place, I didn't steal it. I got it out of my ex-violin case. Let me see it. Looks like some kind of sugar. Oh, a sugar hoarder. Let's report him. Don't taste like sugar. It binds. Hey, maybe that's some kind of evidence. Must be. Or else you wouldn't carry it around in my violin case. I think we ought to shadow this place. That's a swell idea. Bruno, you're appointed. Oh, Nix, I might be a Junior G, but I'm also an S.B.B. What is an S.B.B.? A Scared Black Boy. Well, nevertheless, you're appointed, and you're going to stay undercover and guard this place. If anything happens that don't look kosher, you inform us. If anything happens, I'll inform me first. Enriques, disappointed. Oh, Nora. Look, be yourself, Phil. We're grown-ups. All I want to know is, is it true or isn't it? Well, I have got some Jap friends, if that's what you're worried about. Paid for it, too. No wonder you insisted on Sarno's to eat. A big shot. Maybe I spent my money on the wrong girl. You're contemptible. All right, maybe I am a Jap spy. So what? You were kidding about being a spy, weren't you, Phil? Look, Danny, for the last time. Come on, give me the lowdown. I'll give you a slap on the puss if you don't lay off. By the way, what were you guys doing snooping around Matsui's? What were you doing there? I was buying the old lady some tea. Mum don't drink tea. Well, I can buy some tea for myself, can't I? You're lying. Shut up. You're nothing but a two-timing double-crosser. Look, Danny, I'm sorry. I'll let that be a warning. Hey, don't feel bad, kid. If your brother wants to be a stool, you can't do nothing about it. You must have gone nuts. Phil ain't like that. He used to say the Navy was the best job in the world. Yeah, but maybe his new job pays more dough. Take it easy. Oh, hello, boys. Come in. Life, I guess. Say, Nora, there's a little something we want to ask you to do for us. Sure, what is it? We've been doing a little snooping on our own, and we think we got a clue. What's that? Just a little something that we think might be important. Yeah, we took it to Charlie the Chinaman. He said it was Jap writing. Too bad my brother isn't here. Did you try to get him at the office? Eh, he don't pay no attention to us. I knew a Jap I used to go to high school with. I'd be glad to get a translator for you. Oh, that's swell. Well, listen, now, take good care of this, and don't let nobody get it away from you. Yeah. Because you never can tell. And as soon as you find out what it is, just tell Danny and let us know. You bet. Take it easy. Hey, Clint, let's go up to your place and get some chow. You're not taking me to your house for chow! You got a little bowl of chow to stand between friends? Oh, I'm sorry. Beef and beef chow, that's a good idea. I don't like that. Bug. How about some chow? Me and my friends are hungry. Your friends are always hungry. They have homes, haven't they? Certainly, but we're working on a vacation. We don't want to break up right now. Come on, will you? All right, there's some stew on the stove. Help yourself. Get some plates and get some knives and forks. Looks like some kind of sand or powder or something. Here's your plate. Help yourself. Hurry up, will you? I'm getting hungry. Oh, wait a minute. Hey, give me some, will you? This stuff can wait for a while. I'm going to eat first. Give me that, bud. It's enough for a first try. What's this, Morgan? I'm no Rudy. You got some bread? Water? Where is everything? How do you wait on me? I'm hungry. Why are you walking around? You got sugar? You ain't got no coffee. What's the matter with you? Oh, boy. This is the best food in the world. There! Sabotage! It's getting bigger. You don't need to spread it. You need a fine spray. We ain't got no hose. Well, hurry up. Get one. Get some water. Hey, you kids, come here. Quick. Get a mouthful. Make a fine spray. Hurry up. Get some more water here. Get some more. OK. Done. Just like blowing candles out of a birthday cake. That's what I get for feeding a lot of heathens. But, Ma, it was an accident. An accident, was it? I think you're working for the dictator. Get out of here. Hey, where'd you kids get that magnesium? We snitched it from Matsui's store. Yeah, that chap must have brought it there from Heimbach's. Heimbach's? Yeah, he mugs all of my violin. Later on, Glimpy's looking around to find that stuff stowed away in his old violin case. Well, that makes Heimbach's the distributing point for the magnesium. Maybe Kino knew that. Maybe that's why he threw Heimbach out of the store. Possible. Looks like sabotage. See you kids later. So long. Well, that was a swell dinner, Glimpy. We'll be back again tomorrow. Oh, and look, fellas, don't mind my mother. She gets nervous overnight. We'll bring her some aspirin. Take it easy. So long, Glimpy. She said you can't come back no more! Why, Miss Stevens, this is a pleasant surprise. Hello, Joe. You're looking well and as pretty as ever. In fact, I think this is Japanese writing and I'd like to have you translate it. Pleasure. It's some sort of a memorandum to buy some goods. Are you sure? I rather thought it was important. What made you think that? Why, I don't know. I just had an idea. I found it on the street. Just where did you get this? Let go of me! Take your hands off me! She knows too much! We'd better lock her up! Taicho! Let go of me! Let me go! Help! Get me out of here! Help! Get me out of here! What's written on it? Enough to send us away for a long time. Well, read it to me. You'll hear about it. Go ahead, boys. Taicho! Down for double! What do you want? Hit me. Don't hit me. Wait a minute. Hit him. What do you want? Hey, fellas, I seen something. I seen something. All right. This ain't no seance meeting. What'd you see? A crowd of Japs going into Matsui's store. So what? A lot of Japs go in there to buy tea. Yeah, but these Japs wasn't buying no tea. And I saw them go through a hole in the wall. And that German boy, Fritz Heinbach, was with them too. Fritz Heinbach? Yeah. Well, that adds new intricacies to the case. Yeah. Hey, look! Sure looks like them skibbies want a little privacy. Yeah, maybe we ought to get pop. What do you mean, get pop? We've been doing all right at this detecting business so far, and we ain't going to quit now. Yeah? How are we going to get in there? You leave that to me. I don't know. Looks pretty tough to me. Yeah, that is hot, isn't it? Oh, easy. Get up on it, Denny. I thought the same thing at the same time. Let's go. Yeah. Yeah, that's really good. That's really good. OK. You get off his shoulders. See you. All right, fellas. We'll do it. Hey, get your foot out of my way. All right, get up. Get up. Come on. Get up. What are you doing? Get up. You guys are getting old. Come on. What's the matter with you guys? What do I do now? You said you wanted to make a pyramid. You'll never make out the money. Oh, I'm not in the gym. Shut up. Wait a minute. All right. Look, let me tell you what. Why don't you make a pyramid up? Come on. Let's do it. Everybody be nice and quiet. What are you going to do? Give me that. Here, here. Give me it. Give me that. I'm going to break it. Find it. Shut up. What are you guys doing? Here it is. No, wait a minute. Wait a minute. It's right on a knob. Do you come from an old family of mountain climbers? Yes. You'll look like it. You'll look like a mountain climber. Give me that. Wait a minute. What did you say? Wait a minute. Be quiet. Quiet. Give me another box. Over here. There's elevators in a place like this. Coming up. Here it comes. Look out, you don't fall down, Muggs. Take it slow now. Easy. Kind of wobbly. Watch out, Muggs. Another box. Coming up. Here it comes. Look out, Muggs. Got it. Nice catch. Easy. Take it easy. Over to the left a little. Look out, Muggs. There ain't no doors in this place. Man, we is in here, but we still ain't no home. Anybody got a candle? I got some matches. Might have some. What is that? We really put our foot in it. I don't know why we came here in the first place. Hey, Clippy, where'd you go? Hey, where's Muggs? Must be my liver. It's just one of those modernistic doors. We can't be no worse off than we are now. Go on, Scrooge. Lead the way. Man, I'm too here for that job. Go on. I'll give you my load of dice. The ones with all the sevens on them? Yeah. Solid, old man. I ain't going down there for a stunt. Not even for the dice? Not even for fried chicken. Who's shoving? I think I'll be after you. You go after me. Awful dark down here. All these kids are scary. Are you kidding? I'll see you later. Man, this ain't no house. This is a ghost trap. Whatever it is, I don't like it. Man, that bathtub must be enchanted. You're not jiving, Jack. I ain't jiving either. Where is this secret? Right down there. Just those cats, please. What's the matter with you? You want to tip us off? Looks like a masquerade party. Nobody invited me, so I'm going home. You don't have to be invited. Didn't you ever crash a party? What do you think this is, boss? Come back soon. Send in a searching party. I'll go get them. We'll go with you. He won't come to for a while. Tie him up quick. Tie his legs. He's off for good. Drag him behind that screen when you get through. Get his hands. Drag him back there. Go on, put him back. Tie that up. Maybe they're just a bunch of actors rehearsing a play or something. Nah, I think it's Japanese Halloween. Let's take a look at these gowns anyway. It might be. Oh, beautiful piece of goods. Two pair of pants come with these, I wonder? I'm going to put one on, too. Hey, Lono. Yeah? Your uncle. Boy, what a healthy set of chops this house has got today, huh? Hey, those fellas is wearing hoods. I wonder where they keep them. There they are right there. Hey, get those hoods. Hurry up. Each one of you put one of these on will become incognito, see? Now we can play trick or treat. Now listen, we go in that place just like we belong, just like we was invited. We sit down, we don't say a word. And maybe we'll find out what's going on. Woo-hoo! Well, follow the leader, boys. I wonder where they're going. You're one rising sun that's not going to rise. Hey, Charlotte. It's a fall show star. Recognize us? Emperor Hirohito. Listen well. If there are any among you who should go forward to peril, let them withdraw now, for there will be no turning back later. Only torture, death for traitors, and for weaklings. We must at once strangle our common enemy, this democracy, to assume our rightful... Hey, there's an iron mark here. I told you. Yeah, I'd like to give him a haircut with a mowing machine. We will ruin the dance. We have our enemies under our control. Things is really getting complicated. He's in on this too, huh? He's in on everything. He got my violin, didn't he? Before proceeding, I shall permit you to see an extraordinary face of a benefactor to us. One who has provided us with invaluable information. Our brother... Hey, that's Phil. We are proud to bow to a man this valuable on our behalf. You can't do nothing about it now. You will now each take a blood oath of fidelity. I ain't got a way to get to him, I'll tell him. Which is as easy to get out of this place as it was to get in. I'm beginning to worry. There are spies among us. Everyone, remove his hood! And my mammy told me to be in the pit at nine o'clock. The curfew rang for us when Muggs got the idea of coming here. You gotta get a bad idea once in a while. It's the law of averages. Seize those men! Not if I seize you first! Sam's your chump. Uh-oh. There goes little Red Riding Hood. A beautiful piece of Harry... He committed suicide. I don't know how you kids got in here, but I'm sure glad you did. Look, Danny, you try and get out of here and get the police. I'm gonna get Nora. Nora? Sure, they've got her locked up. Now go on. Right. Come on. I don't know. Don't tea-pop. There's the crumpets right on the floor. The new champion! Is that wedding bells I hear? Oh, honey, we won't be able to go on a honeymoon. I've got orders to report for duty immediately. So long, Danny. So long, Bill. I don't feel bad. We'll take you on your honeymoon. Come on, let's go. See you in Tokyo. Bye.