December 4, 2024 15:08:45

It's official. After several deaths and suicide attempts, the government enacted legislation banning yoga. Practitioners of yoga are ordered to cease any yoga related activities immediately, turn in any yoga materials or equipment to neighborhood safety patrols by midnight tonight, and report to their nearest police station to enroll in re-education courses. Are you Diane Adams? Yes. Miss Adams, my name is Officer Williams. Are you currently enrolled in yoga classes at the Sunnyside Recreation Center? Um... Is that a yoga mat? It's for Pilates. Miss Adams, are those yoga pants? Pilates pants? And what is that? Bring her in. As police conduct arrests tonight, the government wants to remind citizens that this is for your own protection. If you have a family member or acquaintance involved with anything yoga related, don't hesitate to report them. Police have already arrested over 5,000 who have refused to give up their practice and have confiscated yoga mats, instructional videos, scented candles, and incense. Do you agree to give up your practice? Apprehending cult members is tiring work, but many are working overtime to get the job done. This is how much the government cares about its people. Well then, perhaps I can persuade you to give it up. Do you think this is ridiculous? Hard to believe? Well, think again. A very similar thing is happening right now in China. Since 1999, the Chinese communist regime has brutally persecuted practitioners of Falun Gong, also known as Falun Dafa, a spiritual practice with exercises similar to yoga. The Chinese regime blanketed all TV channels with propaganda branding Falun Gong an evil cult. Falun Gong practitioners have been arrested, beaten, electrocuted, killed, and even had their organs harvested to be sold for profit in Chinese hospitals. What is their crime? Taking part in a self-improvement practice based on the principles of truthfulness, compassion, and tolerance, the persecution is now in its 20th year and still continues.