Episode 5: Is work-life balance a myth?

And welcome to episode 5 season 2 of So You're Not. Episode 5? Episode 5? Oh my god. We've already done more episodes than Malfoy has. No. Isn't it funny how it was that you did the intro? Yeah. I just stepped back on that. Yeah, I thought you could chime in at any time. No, no, no. I think you've got it. That's why that you have it. I think you sound really nice in that uniform. I don't. I think if I were you When are we? What time? You just knew that. You didn't even double check. I didn't. Even if I knew and I double checked, I'd probably still drive on in and double check again. So today. Wow, you're really bad at conversations. Don't say so. You're a liar. Don't say so. Today we're talking about the myth of white plaid palettes. Is it? I mean, too long, didn't read. Yes. Well, I think you know what I find. Do you? Yeah. That's what we're here to discuss. Do you know that you can have white plaid palettes? I think some people can when you freelance. Yeah. Sorry, I love doing that because that's what everyone thinks, that you just don't work. No. Everyone thinks that your work life balance is no work and just life. And then sometimes you're like. I mean, so I am self-employed. I start my own business for the work life balance. You know, trying to get that mental health off the And I don't think I've ever had work life balance. And I don't think that's typical. Is that a you problem? Yes. Yes. Is that a you issue? Because people who typically aren't neurodivergent are probably better at organising. And they have less stuff. Right. So I work probably 40 to 50 hours a week. Yeah. I have. No, not now. Not in the moment. One may help us and be brilliant. I've cut back. Sure. All right. You've cut back. I've cut back. And so I work 40 to 50 hours a week. And I have a podcast. The novel is coming back on the agenda. That's the other thing. Pick it up. And I am like a novel. I love how you say it differently. When you say it's a novel, I say it's a book. I don't know. Why do you say novel if you don't mind saying book? No, it's because a book is fake. So it's a novel? No, a novel is a story. Okay. So a novel is a story. I know what you mean. I'm just saying if you tell me you write a novel, you write a book. So a book could be true. Whereas novels tend to be stories. Anyway. I mean like as in a fiction story. Yeah, yeah. You're right. Yeah, that's true. Anyway, you're right. You're writing a fiction. Yeah. I'm writing a fiction. I'm writing a book. Non-fiction. Oh, what am I being done right now? Non-fiction is a fact. Yeah. You're writing fiction. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. I don't know why that took me a minute. Could it be true? It's set in an alternative reality. It could be true. Wow. No spoilers for you. Wow. No spoilers for you. I'm trying to exercise. Stunning. I'm trying to. Learning services in the loose towns are actually also frequently exercises. Unlike many of us. I know. Your level of. It's not frequent. You frequently exercise. You're not consistent with the same kind of exercise. Yeah. You kind of, they're all over the place. Whereas like a lot of people are like runners, you know. I can't do gymnastics now. Oh. Yeah. You lost a glove. A little bit. I did like lose it a little bit once I was committed. Okay. Also, so the trainer that I had. Does it be fair? No. Sorry. Why wouldn't they do that? I don't know why. It's because he was talking recently about feeling it and I was like, oh my God. He told me he felt fine before so then I was is it because it was when you quit? Anyway, this is what I don't think. I've done a quick gymnastics because when I joined two or three reasons, I joined, it was the summer holidays. So they had 4 p.m. classes. Stunning. Didn't realize that wasn't always the case. Wow. What's the classes? Like seven and 9 p.m. They've got 9 a.m. midday and then 7 and 9 p.m. What a weird time. It's just a bit too late for me. Yeah. First up. Because like by 7 p.m. I'm like, done. Yeah. So whose kids are on that by 7 p.m.? You and your children but I'm just thinking I was doing gymnastics. I'm like, which class would I get? Probably the 12 p.m. one. Yeah. But I can't do that because I've got client work. Like, you know. Work. But anyway, so I didn't realize that the 4 p.m. classes were going to be gone. Yeah. And then I found on a Thursday they did a 6 p.m. class. Okay, yeah. And I was like, oh, okay. So you're going to swap, yeah. Still not ideal but I'm gonna swap to that. And then the trainer that was there when I started my first three classes, four classes, she was finishing. And they didn't have a new trainer for a couple of weeks. So they kept cancelling that 6 p.m. class. And it would be at like half 4. And they'd be like, oh, we've got space on the 7 or 9. 9. And I'd be like, no. And they only run classes Monday to Friday, weekends and exclusively children. And because I'm quite late in the week, if I can't do that Thursday now. Yeah, now as well. And there's no evening classes on a Friday, that's a whole week now that I've missed a class. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it doesn't make sense. And so, yeah. And although the classes were like, oh, you know, you can still take it whenever. I could do it whenever during the month. So I could have done another week where I did two or three classes to make up for it. But like, it was hard enough finding one class that I could make it to. But did you get a refund for cancelling? No. Do you pay up for the loan? You pay monthly. Oh, yeah. It's a month of contract. It's fine. It is what it is. Yeah. It's rather sad, though. Yeah, it is a bit sad. But it's okay. It's that work-life balance, man. Kids, I'm trying to have some balance. But there's no balance. Weirdly for me, I think, with work-life balance, I think I've got it currently. And that's because Nora's now an nursery full-time. And you work three days a week. And I work three days a week. But I'm supposed to increase. But I'm supposed to increase. And I think if I increase, then that, like, balance is gone. Because even my shift work, okay, like, my morning shift is seven till three. That means that I'm up at, like, six. Then I'm coming back, picking up Nora. Then Nora's up at, like, seven, eight. Oh, I'm sad. I'm like, okay, I don't want to go to sleep. And then on my days off, I have a weird, like, I either have to clean or I have, like, a weird hyper-focus where I'm, like, I don't know if you can see the scratches. Yeah. Well, yesterday, it was cleaning the bath. And I saw a new thing about how you put something down the drain. Then you can, like, scribble all the hair from the sink. So I did that. It was very satisfying. Gross, but satisfying. It was funny seeing all my different hair colours. Because I also don't ever put hair down the sink, ever. It's only because, like, if I wash my hair and it, like, falls out. Most of the time, if I try that, I'm going to stick it And then I take it off at the end, obviously. I'm like, I'm like, take it and throw it in the bin. Because I don't want to block the drain. Yeah, like a nutter. So he'll come in, like, you're like, oh, now there's a human down the drain. Um, anyway, so that was really worth off the, but I don't, I, I think I have what I live on as currently because I'm part-time. But I have the luxury and very privileged to be able to be part-time currently and afford it. Because Seahill substitutes, like, Seahill substitutes, is that what it is? He does not substitute my income. He subsidises my income. So I'm like, we've got that, like, privilege. But not everyone in a very expensive time in UK history. Did you see that off-topic completely? Our birth rate has gone down by, um, it's now below 17%. We're, like, the lowest in, like, years of wealthiest countries in the world. Germany's up 5%, which is crazy. What have they been getting up to recently? Um, they're just running around doing this. In Germany? It's crazy. I'll show you the videos later. But I need to get into this in the podcast. But Germany's massive, so, like... I've seen that. I've seen videos. Yeah, but you haven't seen videos from every... Oh, not the people, by the way, the enforcement. So, like, police officers, not the people, the people are protesting. But look at our government. If you were looking at governments, you would think yeah, yeah, yeah, true. But our birth rate is still going up. Um, people are looking at our government again. I felt like, well, it's not going to happen. It's a party. People are down there. I'm not looking at the government again. I felt like, can't do that. They're like, maybe all her children will bring light, which is what children should do. And what I think is brilliant. Anyway, very off-topic. Um, but yeah, so what... Do you know, I actually only realised this summer that, um, it's really embarrassing. Um, because it's something that I tell my clients all the time. But for myself, I have only realised this summer that full-time, my client capacity to work full-time is three days. You know, that's funny because that's what you were telling me recently about like, I can only do like this many full-time days and I need to have this time to do like admin or in-house stuff or whatever. Um, and yeah, I'd never heard you talk about that before. Yeah. Like being able to be like, actually say like what your limits are. But it's because I've been under charging. So I've had to work all the hours. To make up for it. Yeah. Whereas now, for the most part, you're being paid what you deserve. Well, I'm being paid what I ask. Yeah. So. Which is really good. I heard. Do you know what I am? You deserve your pay. Do you know what is like really wild? I'm dreadful. I'm so bad at like advertising myself. Yeah. That I was going to maybe work with like a branding person or something who could like write me a CV, take up all of my experience, write it all out. Because I cannot tell you what I'm good at. Right. I had to try really hard to, like that client interview I had, where they were like, so what value do you bring? I was like, fuck no. This is like me when people ask me what my hobbies are. I don't know. But people tell me this is hard, I'm stumped. But while in working with a client, they love me. Most of my clients work with me on repeat for years. That's really sad. I'm just. That is sad that you just don't. Yeah. You've got a screen for love. Yeah. Sorry. Yeah. Me too. I think you're really cool. Me too. I think you were a bad, you didn't work with a branding person. No. Okay. No, I just sort of sat down and had to figure that out. Yeah. I just started advocating for myself really. So I just did. No, just sat down and you just thought, no, you did just have your pay. Yeah. Well, I just thought, you know what? It's the season to be Also, I don't want to work with all these people. Makes a lot of sense. I'm glad you're advocating for yourself. But again, because people don't advocate for themselves, like you are now, exactly what happened to you before is you were working all these crazy hours and not having, you weren't freelance. You started working for yourself for this reason. And then that's just messed up. Yeah. Everything because you weren't getting paid what you deserve. And it took me an embarrassingly long time to realise. Well, like, okay. So I've seen a lot. So I've hopped on LinkedIn, right? I love LinkedIn. Holding hand. Look at my channel line. Sorry, you can't see it now. That's right. Yeah, you can see it. Mine is just as bad. From the watch. My watch is down with something in my bed and I can't. We're using the plug socket to also charge my own tablet. So I just had a ADHD. But like, so I've hopped on LinkedIn just to look at the corporate jargon. And one, people are crazy. People who hop on LinkedIn are actually insane. Like some of the stuff they say, I'm like, wow. So you're just saying that with your chest. That's nice. Derek from HR. But then I've seen some stuff that's like talking about how some big companies are in uproar about the four day work week. And then, and then some people are like, no, I think everyone deserves a four day work week. And I'm like, oh, that's funny. Hey, doctors and nurses. Would you like a four day work week? Would that be nice? Hey, customer service people, retail workers, anyone, child care, would you like a four day work week? Great. I'm sure we all would like a four day work week. They don't have work life balance. Work life balance is a luxury. New fans can't wait. All for creatives. I'm luxury all for creatives. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. They obviously let you know. I mean, it seems like you just, I went on a tangent and I lost you halfway. Like you've come back to me and like, Emily, this part really needs to get trimmed. Like that's a game for me. Well, it's fair. I don't actually think that. I was just saying what you've come back. Absolutely not. It's a great growing. No, I, I, I totally agree with you. Um, you know, we talk a lot about work life balance, but we're talking about office workers that work night to five. Yeah. And obviously even target the 15 months, three hours and the 33 hours, whatever. If you're a child, the 15, we know that we can get it from nine months. Would I necessarily want to use it from nine months? Probably not. But, um, the, even like when we were still doing the previous episode about how like some people were still paying like 500, 600 pounds, um, in childcare costs, even with the three hours because of that. And so it's like a luxury, right? To like, to get a work life balance, you'd have to, something has to, something has to give, get for this to be able to happen. Like, and it does not necessarily for parents either. I'm just talking about like in general terms, like work life balance, you have to be in a specific type of job because even you said you could be a creative, but if you're getting underpaid, or if you don't know your value, or you're just a workaholic, you do you babe, whatever you feel like, something has to give to be able to get that work life balance. You even have to have like a boss that gets it and wants it. Cause it's funny because the retail section that I work at Ireland, they, um, they do condense working. So it's like your full time, if you're doing five days a week, you do four days a week. So you do your 39 hours in four days. Um, but it's crazy because they, they put it in all of the advertising, like come across. Condensed hours, you get condensed working. You get a tarts with tiny pay if you've been here already. You get, you get condensed, you can get condensed working. If it's not in busy periods and no one else is on holiday, that's not a huge change. You're a real stop, but you get it. It's on your contract. You get it. Yay. You get quality food. Only if it's within budget and only if it's shared with everyone else and it's healthy, which is, oh, I think it's pretty good for the class from health food. Um, but like it's all these like recourse, but they're advertising it like empty. Yeah. Yeah. It's like even when they advertise for, um, for mental health stuff, right. It's this, it's probably the worst thing I've seen. Um, it's like, this is someone saying you'll be right. Well, it's like a therapy app, but it's not like, it's not that you'll have a one appointment. You Um, and a lot of it is CPT anyway, but also it's only if you've had certain things happen within the workplace that you get that. Okay. Um, and it's not just like you're sad. Yeah. Which they advertise it as like, you feel depressed or anxious or you're going through emotional time. Get up here. And it's like, you have a huge wellness facility, like just an online facility to, to use. And it's, yeah, it's literally like not, it's like webpages, some crosswords. I'm kidding. And also they're like free dental care. If you're above the fire, like it's like, if you're like, uh, so I'm a fear. So it's like two above me. Okay. So like the best paid people. Yeah. But now like, yeah, you also get like access to private health care. Like it's like right at the bottom, like in little stuff, such as wild, like, but that's what I mean. So like we have the condensed working and it's supposed to be for your work-life balance and yeah, we get more productivity from you. But again, if it's a busy period, so through the Christmas period, through the whole of December, no one's allowed any holiday and no one's allowed to work condensed hours. Um, and it also means that you're probably not working condensed hours and probably do more than this because it's like so busy or whatever. Um, and then it's a black Friday or same, same type of things. It's the same. Like you do not, you can go on. It's okay. No, it's all right, babe. If we're by the same, you can already early. Yeah, obviously by the same. Not all of us have ADHD. Maybe you can keep us starting. Okay. Oh, I need to cool. Anyway. Um, yeah, like it's just that kind of fake bullshitting, pretending to live, like pretending to, to accommodate for the dream of what I found, even okay. Post COVID all the remote working stuff. Now you've got like whole websites and stuff dedicated to remote working, all of this stuff. And then you find out that in the small print is you remote work one daily advertising for like, for what remote working and, and people generally want people to come back to the offices. Yeah. And they'll scream about, which I don't understand. Probably because that's someone who's done a lot of work in the service office space. Um, it's because these leases are long. So companies sign leases for service offices or office space for like 10, 15 years. Crazy. Yeah. So they're paying for office space. You particularly in like big city. Yeah. They're paying for office space. That's barely being used. So it's an expense. Yeah. And then obviously you have the whole mobile economy and about local shops and coffee shops and bars for every, you know, one person that is still working hard and productivity on home. You know, you will have a Gary that's taken about one bad apple. He's got one bad apple. What was that like in the office as well? Or in the work environment? I'll tell you. Mine used to work in the house. Which is a little obvious. I used to chat so much. Yeah. I'd probably chat more like more at work than I would like on a Zoom because I wouldn't just go. Yeah. I'd be like, oh, I actually have a certain amount of things to kick off. Also my washing's about to stop. So I'm trying to do that. And I would like just fuck about in the office. Yeah. Oh, there's no more tea. I'm on like my 20th round of tea of the day. Just so I can walk away from my desk. The dream for me would be to get like an office job that is where I might like go for like a morning walk, take my laptop type situation. But, um, yeah. But if I'd be working, I couldn't not work because I'd be bored. But like the amount of people, well one, live in London. That would get to know them straight away. Also have a bad morning when we get out, be in pyjamas, someone would have a meeting. All of a sudden they're like, can they hear me on and off? It's okay. You just, you change your top. Oh, I have seen that. I have seen that. Like today I did like my couple of hours client work in pyjama bottoms and this jumper. Fair enough. Well, quite a lot. I just gotta work like that. Usually I put on leggings. I have a cute face. It doesn't matter. Cause I'm like, Oh, I'm going to walk. I'm gonna, you know, in my work day. But this morning with the 8am meeting, I was like, I need to be cozy. It's funny how much like appearance has a thing about like how serious people take you. So I always said this at work, right? I said like, you guys can like, you guys can just walk up here, look in. Makeup free. Living your best life. Shaggy hair. People were like, man, pal. If I don't wear makeup, if I looked even a smidge run down, people are like, where's the manager? Because she has no idea what she's doing. She doesn't know. She has no idea what she's doing. She's a child. She's a literal, how old are you? She's a literal child. Can someone, is there a man here? Like that's the vibe. Is there a manager? But I can also wear this outfit. If I don't have my makeup and hair done, people are like, die, Brady. And will not take me seriously. If I have my hair and makeup done, I don't know, maybe I'll just be a malignant. Maybe it's all in my head. Maybe I'm stuck to a couple without makeup. No one takes me seriously. But people will be like, oh, a little child. Get out. In my, in my last long, um, so people take me seriously when I'm with them. No, they don't. No, no. Like, I think it's your voice. Maybe. All around, people are like, you sound like a child. It's not like you look like a child. You sound like one. Um, in my- Maybe I'm like delicate. Everyone tells me this, by the way. Everyone who has only ever heard your voice, or like seen your face, but like not spoken to in person, with me, they've always been like, oh, your voice is, oh, your voice is soft, very light. I mean, posh. Well spoken. Not in your face, posh. Sweet, dammit. Pipe. Crispy. Like a full angel, baby. Whispering our ears. Are you crazy? You. We speak. Oh, because of you. I'm not ever falling in love. I smoke 25 cigarettes a day. And I'm like, wow, okay. Good. It's in your belly. People compare us a lot, it does hit me. You make fun of me. I know, it's the tongue and dongle bewildering me, seriously. People just think I'm really young. You are really young. But like, like 10 years down the line, I'm like, we are really young. Thanks, babe. Like, I got- You absolutely did. My last client- But I would say you look it. I do not look 24. Aw. If everyone got that, what, lonely faces? Yeah, you do. No, you don't. Yeah, you absolutely do. I think I look 30 now. Do you think you hit 30? Yeah, and then we're like, we're away. I did not look 25. Oh, my God. I've started to realise, easily. I've started realising without make-up, I had bags on my head. Aw. It's like I've been waiting for it to happen. But it happened. All of a sudden, I'm like, oh, you haven't had this thing. So, that's where I got up to. I had bags and I was like 17 or so. No, you haven't. You always look youthful. You always have looked youthful and I feel like you always will look youthful. I feel like because so many people have told me for my whole life, don't worry, when you're 40, you're going to love it because you're 20 and you're going to look so young. I'm going to get to 40 and I'm going to look like a fair 50 or 60. And they're going to be like, oh, fuck. What happened to you? Do you think that's going to- You were so youthful until just now. So, there's going to come a time when my collagen just runs out. Mine's already started. I have wrinkly hands. I just didn't- I do prefer to speak to moisturisers. So, I probably just feel like, oh my god, my hands are wrinkly. It's not a big deal, I can't. It looks nice. That's what I just said. I'm not a moisturiser. No. They aren't wrinkly at all. But then mum's hands are wrinkly. Mum's not very wrinkly either. No. No. No. You said that mum's not wrinkly. Why did I say not very? She's not wrinkly. She looks like she's 12. And then you thought about it and I'm like, hey mum, Katie thinks you're wrinkly. No one takes you seriously. No one takes you seriously. With or without makeup, you know, at least half of the time, some people like me. So, fine. People don't always like me. No, people always like you. People would never like me. You're just a baby. I'm just a baby. You're just a baby. It is your soft side of the voice. Like, you know your shit. And then some people will be like, I think also my problem, gift curse, is I'm not convincing you of shit. So, if we're in a meeting and I'm telling you the best way to do something and you're like, nah, we're going to do it this other way. I'm like, okay babe, you do you. Oh, I see. I see. I'm not going to persuade you that I'm like the expert. You've either hired me or you haven't. You have to get to that point where you realise you're the expert and you're fucked up. Yeah. I have a thing, maybe because of the industry I'm in, but I have a thing of being like, I will shout at you until you know I'm like, um, can I buy a spray? I don't really do that. People don't take me seriously, most like colleagues of mine don't take me seriously in the terms of like, they know I know my stuff, but because I joke and laugh with everyone, I have this always, that people just think I'm just always like, chill. I don't really, I don't have any care in the world. And then like most of the time, I've essentially got to pick up on me being like, if I'm now in a shit mood, something's gone wrong and we really need to get down into it. But even when it's the most stressful times, I'm really like, don't even worry about it. Yeah. Easy breezy, beautiful. Whereas a lot of my colleagues right now are being like, how? And I'm like, this is me. So what's happened? It's really interesting. I've, so I'm now on my second three month contract with this tight role. And I've come back. And you're walking around like, oh yeah. I've come back from holiday and I'm like, I'm going to be myself. And just so, in a team meeting yesterday, well, first in a team meeting, I called out the CEO for yawning whilst I was talking. Oh, no, I like that. Kind of accidentally, but. No, it wasn't accidentally, was it? Have you done it before? No, I don't, not that I've noticed, but I was presenting. So what was it? So you talk. I was presenting. I'm like, big arms over his head. And I was like. I'd be, I'd be. You might see. Is that what you did? Yeah. Oh my God, I love it. And he was like, but I could not stop thinking about it. All Ethan and I was like, was I rude? That was the CEO. Did I fuck up? Nah. And then, yeah, so I was like, okay, that's, oops. But also, so I went after the CEO that I said to you today that you were tired. Yeah, he asked me if I was tired. Payback. I love this, payback. When was the meeting yesterday? Two. Okay, he was tired because he was up at 4am. Basically, that's what he was saying, yeah. Oh my God, that's hilarious. I love piecing together things like that. So yeah, I accidentally called up the CEO. Hilarious. But also, clean energy, love it. But also, I went after the, so the head of sales. So I'm like their head of marketing at the moment. Yeah. Their head of sales was presenting for us the numbers, pictures that are out at the moment. And I went after him and I was like, well, you know. He's the fisherman, if we're, you know, working together. I was like, and sales is, you know, the person literally putting the rod up. And it's my job as marketing to put the big, fat, juicy worm. So people come to us. It's disgusting. But yeah, that was the. Big, fat, juicy worm. And I said, honey, put her up to the bay. So, you know, when you go fishing. Oh my God. So then when you're fishing, you know. You're icing it. You're icing it out. What was the worm? Can you see the worm? Oh, I love it. I love it so much. Some people loved it. And some people was like, that's very visual. Sierra, thanks, Susan. What did you want from us? I don't see it. I was like, maybe we use like a carrot in there. What did you want? Sorry. Did you rather it be like, I don't understand. I don't understand what's wrong with you. I'm sorry. I'm afraid. Is people still wanting to have us? Also, sorry. You're the vegan. And all of these meat eaters are getting upset when you use the meat allergy. You're going to be like, sorry. The soybean. What was it? Like, look at our honey. There's a little humble underbean. I'm just a bit of a pollen. But then global warming came. And now it's a butterfly shed. That's the competition. Competition with global warming. Do you know, they're... Yeah, we've got like, hardly any butterflies left. Yeah, I saw that. Except when you go into London Zoo and you go into that butterfly shed and it's like a flying effect. That wouldn't have happened. London Zoo has taken it all. What do they do though? They pollinate. They do the same job as bees. They just don't make any honey. Oh, so you just don't care about them. Well, I guess. Because they don't make honey. I guess. Everyone's always being like, bees are wonderful. We need them for adventures. We need butterflies. We need moths. We need bees. We don't need moths. We need butterflies. Moths just come in and eat your clothes. That's what they do. And fly into your London face when you're on your phone in the dark. Is it actual moths that eat your clothes? Yeah. Like, actual moths? Yeah. Why wouldn't you be the one? I just wasn't sure if it was like a different, special kind of moth. Because there's so many moths. But like, not all moths. No, I think it is all moths. But to be fair, I've never had moths eat my clothes. No, me neither. I had a housemaid that used to like, really have a big issue with it. All of her clothes just had like... What's she doing with her clothes? I don't know. Sorry, this is... If you've got a moth phone, it's not you. It's not you, it's them. I'm sorry. We live in the same house. So why does she have such a broad moth lane? Nah, she won't live there. I mean, she was very fancy though. Was she just chewing her clothes? Maybe. Oh, what does she have? Does she have like, cashmere and stuff? Maybe. Because doesn't cashmere just disintegrate? I don't know. She was convinced it was moths. Anyway. Well, I guess we'll find out. I'm sure I messed you up in this. So, you like to touch moths? I don't think you knew that I was watching. I didn't eat my clothes. I wasn't chewing on them. And it was moths, okay? It was. They were actually staying in my clothes because they liked to be all juicy when they didn't want to get into your wardrobe, so... The moths found you a lot, okay? Because they like me. I can see it happening. So, yeah, I've really come back ready to be myself. I'm really happy about that. I wonder how that's going to convey to a working sexist. Because that was the point of this episode. So, anyway, do you think we have work-life balance? I think work-life balance is a luxury. I think you can get it, but it takes discipline. Let's face it, that's fun. So, over the summer, it was the first time I've ever met my income goals with the least amount of clients. And I was fully booked. That's nice. I like that, dear. And now, this bit, October to December, it's the same again. I'm fully booked out. Meet my income goals. Oh, my nose is a mullet, yeah. So, I'm fully booked out of my income goals. Again, fully booked out. Thank you. Thanks for that. Thanks for the praise. With the minimum amount of... Effort. Not a resort of effort. Clients. That's a lot of effort. Quite a lot of work. Since you, like, voice that to me every day. I'm like... Get on it. Okay, look. Roses. Rain. More. Like, I'm really good at my job. Don't get me wrong. But it's just... That's a fucking killer analogy. What do they want from me? Love it. What do they want from your work? Roses to your portfolio. Can we look at your stamina deposit? I have no idea. It's here. I don't have one. Recognize that. I recognize the visual form analogy. What? Oh my god. She was in that meeting. It was weird. It was a weird... Paul. Pauline. She wiggled. She was dancing on camera. And they got a little selfie done. She was like, cha-cha. They also said in that meeting, they said, like, someone was like, honestly, you're glowing. You really look rested from two weeks. Oh my god, did you say it was sweat? And I was like, oh, I'm actually really tired. I was like, I felt like I was the first day back at school with a migraine and switched off. Oh my god, is that the compliment? Who said you were glowing? Yeah, I remember this guy was like, you would have been tired if you'd been here for the last two weeks. You'll make no sympathy here. And I was like, okay, sorry. What did you do for your holiday? Because clearly, it wasn't good enough. And I was like, jealous. Jealous much? Maybe you need to have some time off. Maybe you should take a holiday. It's funny. When you say about, like, you're going to come back into your true self. So I, in high stress situations, and, like, times where people are, like, anxious about making a good impression, like, our area manager coming to visit. A lot of people will go, like, really come, like, stare at me, like, oh, yeah, um, yeah. And they'll try and do, like, their best version of themselves. I am so sarcastic. I can't contain the sarcasm. Like, he was like, yeah, so you guys would, like, your story is probably, like, the best in the air. I was like, no, really? Obviously. Look at our store. Never met this man in my life. Never met him. You meet him with level 10 sass. I'm not level 10, babe. I hope you're 20. Like, because he was, like, he was a guy I've heard, like, I've also really, hi, boss. He said really good things about you. And, like, he said that you'd be, like, helpful with all the change. And I was like, oh, yeah. Sorry, don't have to be. Like, the other manager's really lovely. And he's, like, laughing, like, sorry, daddy. And then he's being, like, I can't, it's, like, anything he's saying. I'm like, he's, like, and I'm saying some, obviously, I'm saying some good stuff. Like, I'm like, oh, yeah, like, obviously, when the network's back up, I'll be able to, like, actually sort out the tickets properly. And I think the flow of the store is really nice, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, but obviously, you know, I think I said, like, we'll have to see how much money you make from the move or something. And he was like, oh, well, yeah, they did quote, like, these big moves as, like, a hundred and two million, they expect stores to make from these big moves and the changes that they made because of the flow of the store and, like, the products that they were placed with. Because obviously, they were placed with 16 pound olive oil. That's what he had stolen. And, like, we're talking, like, average, I think, but I'm telling you, any time it came to, like, points where we're not talking about a store, it's just sad. And I'm thinking to myself, I can see, I'm having an out of body experience. I'm looking at myself, I'm like, shut the fuck up. Yeah, well, you're a manager, babe. You've never met this man in your life. You've, I don't know how, managed to miss him every time he's, like, every time that he's come in, I was supposed to have worked, but my shift was changed that last minute. Like, every time he's come in, it wasn't changed last minute. It was purposely done last minute. And, like, so I, like, never met him. And, like, he was laughing. It was obviously having fun. But, like, he was obviously being quiet. Stop it. You can just accept the compliment. You can just accept it and move on. And then he's into watching me do the planning. I'm like, oh, yeah, it's all right. All of this will get stolen. And he's laughing. He's like, oh, yeah, we should probably start, like, you know, maybe, like, figuring out a way to, like, security tag individual bars. I was like, that would be the dream. Or people could just not shoplift. But I just couldn't, like, there was no level of seriousness. And I was like, either he's gonna come away from it being, like, what a witty person. Great. Love that. Very intelligent. Obviously good at her job. Or he's gonna come away from that being a good operator, as it were. Fire hair. That person probably should be a colleague. What the fuck was that? Like, that was the level of sassy car. I did get £10 off, I'd say. Yeah. Versus, like, you can spend it however you like. Insane. You can use it for, like, I don't work at this place. I don't work there. With Love It being a particular bonus thing for as soon as there's a place. I don't work there. But, like, generally, like, you can, they're actually, they love it because that's really good. Like, it goes with any bar. And so was it for him? Yeah. That's the one I picked. I don't know. When he gave it to me, and I was like, oh, cheers. I didn't even know how old he was. That was kind of hard. I was like, could it be more? So it's probably good that I didn't check. Because I might have turned and I'd be like, oh, could it be more? Done. Love it. You can go on. Double it. Never given me love for it before, but I guess. I've also just said his name. Probably he's not watching. I really liked you. You seemed like a decent guy. I'm also like, the late backflip. Because he's also the only area manager we've had that hasn't come in and been like, Trainers? In a supermarket? I'm telling you. I wasn't too sure what you were looking at. Well, no, because one area manager came in and said to my colleague, who was working stock at the time, and was like, oh, you don't look very smart and well-represented. What's his shirt? I'm tucked to the back. While he was working stock. Are they all right? And then a week later, they removed the rule of men having to wear ties. Because apparently customers liked them and made that look better. And I was like, I think people are just like, and it doesn't matter. But I said this to my colleague. Sorry, this is going way off topic. I said this to my colleague before, right? When they talk about, like, the uniform and stuff for managers. I said, I was like, do you know what it actually is? It's because they wouldn't give a shit. Like, I wear trainers, like, almost every day. Or I am at my dock site. Like, I wear, I dress casual. I wear, I dress smart casual, right? So I'll wear suit trousers and a t-shirt or the blazer, right? And I wear trainers. That is deemed completely fine because I look presentable. But they can't tell people that they can wear trainers because some people will come in in, like, trashed trainers with, like, holes in it. But they'll say, you said we could wear trainers. Do you know what I mean? Or be like, you can't wear t-shirts because people come in, like, with slogans and stuff. And they can't say no slogans because then people will come in like see-through tops. Maybe we won't do that. Do you know what I mean? Some people don't, like, care at all. I find it crazy that they have to put in our contracts about smelling clean and looking clean. Like, they put it in, like, in a part of our, like, training as well. They're like, how to talk to a poly and tell them to put on deodorant. But I guess it's sensitive, isn't it? Yeah. But why are people gonna let it in? But you might not- Sorry, that's really bad. It's very judgy. I've never heard it, though. I would tell them. But it's a nice thing. But I think it's also other things. There's certain health conditions that can make you very sweaty. Absolutely, I'm a sweaty man. So, like- I stink. Sometimes. Not always. So have you heard this? Has someone ever had the conversation with you? Definitely not, no. But I just think, like, that's- There's- Yeah, yeah. There's things like hygiene that are, um... Sensitive. Ooh! Relate to this episode. Because you said about sensitive issues. That is the thing with work-life balance. Some people need it in terms of if they have a health condition or if they have, um... If they're neurodivergent or if they have a mental health condition. And it can actually be super beneficial for them. Yeah. Again, I think what's nice about things being highly working and remote working now is you can kind of just put it down to that and don't have to explicitly say, yeah, you need to have these work conditions put in place. Yeah. Because of... Well, I get to tell people that my capacity is three days a week. Mm-hmm. That is the absolute maximum I can give you. If you want all of my time. And I don't have to explain why. Yeah. But it's because that's all I can manage. Yeah. But you don't need to tell people that. No. It's all my hard runs. But, like, my- My health, really, even three days a week of client work is too much. Yeah. It's just definitely a privilege, isn't it? It is. Well, that's what I was going to say. So I- When I was bragging earlier about being, you know, well-paid and whatever. It works. I can see it in you. Um... It's stressful, in a way. I do some quite high-intensity work. But it gives me, one, the income that if I didn't do any work outside of those three days- Yeah. I don't need to. Yeah. Don't need to work more than those three days. And if I want to do a week-to-week yoga class, I can afford it. Yeah. If I want to join a gym, I can afford it. I think, in context, though, like, this is taking you a really long time to get to this point. How long have you been freelance? Almost seven years. And it's this year- Yeah. That you've actually got to the mark of the last couple of months, and you've got to a point where you're getting paid what you deserve and asking for what you deserve. Like, I've done projects in the past- Yeah. Where I've got paid well, but they're, like, finite. Yeah. And also you- I've been friends with you a long time. But I've been with you through those moments where you've been like, I'm being paid this much. Am I doing enough? And you're going above and beyond because you thought you almost don't deserve it. Yeah. So obviously, there's the work that you've had to do as well with, like, just having- Yeah, my- Own- It's really interesting. When I first- When I quoted for this work for the first three months, they tried to negotiate price with me. No, I remember. And I was like, no, babe. You always said yes. Well, almost. I said yes with caveats. So they helped me every day. And I said, I can do, if you don't want me every day, but you want that concentrated time, so I work with you Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, we can do it at your price. Yeah. If you want me to touch you every day, it's my price. Yeah. And so I was like, I'm, you know, let me know which works best for you. Yeah. Because actually, for me, I don't really want to touch them every day. I would actually really love some time off kind of. But, so if you want to see me every day, you've got to pay for that. Yeah. So I was negotiating, essentially. But I really expected them to negotiate for the renewal of the contract. Yeah. And they did that? They did. They just went with the same thing that you had before. Does that make you think you should have asked them more? Or should you think that they, like, they just really liked you? I think it's because they could see the value. Oh, yes. Yeah, of course. They won't be asking you, you know, being like, so why do we need to? Yeah. What's good about you? So, to conclude this episode, what I think is, you're already married. I think your wife, they'll be panicking to the fact that you're advocating for yourself. I do think work-life balance isn't a myth. I think it can happen. I think it is a bound point. I think people, when they think about work-life balance, they're not necessarily, they're not, they're not thinking of it like gym, eating well, doing the food shop, managing social life. And working. They're thinking of it just fun and work. Yeah. So, like, a lot of people could, in theory, have work-life balance, if you're just thinking about fun and work. Because they're going out on a Friday. I was like, it works. Yeah. But I think, actually, people need to understand and appreciate. One second. I think people need to understand and appreciate how much time it takes to, you know, do the food shopping, get gym, like, go to the gym. Or, you know, go for a walk or whatever. And have social life. Like, I think it needs to be a whole thing. Some people, maybe you're not going out, out every single week or whatever. But if you're getting that nice, like, outside time or whatever. Or, like, having time to be able to sit down, like, what's really new? Read a book or whatever. Like, I think that's... We need to appreciate the small stuff like that. And not just have it as, like, the goal is to work as little as possible. And... Maximize it. Yeah, exactly. Because, also, I think part of work-life balance, my final point, is work that you would absolutely detest. And... Or, if you do, limit it as possible. But I think even that's a luxury and a privilege to have work that you like. Yeah. I think that's quite rare. Yeah. Because even when they say, like, I'm gonna get a job that you love, you'll never work again or something like that. Like, it's just bullshit. Never work a day of your life. It's not just you're never working. Sounds the same to me, to be honest. I just think it's the same thing. Like, I just think, like... Like, I'm not out here being like, I would love to work at this job for every day of my life. It's so great. Oh my god. But the balance of that, apparently. And the income. And also the socialising it gives me. As in, like, talking to adults. Yeah. Is perfect. Yeah. So yeah, to wrap up that episode. We went off on a tangent for a bit. I went off on a tangent for a bit, though. I'm so sorry. I'm glad we brought it back. Well, am I gonna be the exit person? Like, you're the intro person, I'm the exit person? You can be. With what? What would you plan to do? Let me check. Well, I'll be doing what I need to. Maybe you should be the intro. I don't know. My mind's gone blank. Oh no. We have a date over there. Why? Stay where you are. Just on the spot. Stay where you are. We'll figure it out. There is an episode. Oh my god. We do plan these, by the way. We don't plan what's in them. As you can tell. But we plan what they're going to be about. Anyway, probably next week is going to be a super fun one. I think you're all going to love it. I think you're going to love it. And you're going to really want to come back for more. And it's probably going to be way more thought out than this one. I think it'll be planned and it'll just be really great. So, see you next week. See you next week. Love you. Bye.