Can Men And Women Just Be Friends?

Last week I gave people the chance to ask me anything and one of the questions that came up was can men and women just be friends. I answered it somewhat flippantly with a little test which I'll tell you about at the end of this video but I wanted to elaborate further on this concept of men and women as just being friends. If we're in a relationship with someone we don't necessarily feel all that comfortable with them being in friendships with the opposite sex because we're worried that there might be something more there. What if there's attraction there. I want to delve into this a little more because I feel like there is a somewhat childish assumption that our partner will never be attracted to anyone else and shouldn't be attracted to anyone else and in trying to believe this we also attempt to suppress the most basic of instincts in our partner which is their instinct to become attracted to attractive qualities in other people. The thing is I believe we hang around people that we find attractive. It may be physically attractive, sometimes we may be attracted to their brain and their intelligence, other times it's the way they handle themselves. I don't think that it's realistic to assume that we'll never be attracted to qualities in anyone else other than our partner but what I do believe is that it has no bearing on our loyalty. Our loyalty is something that we exercise when we're in a relationship and has nothing to do with the friendships that we have. In other words you can go out and choose friends who subconsciously even though you won't admit it there may be some level of attraction with. You might be attracted to something in that person. Now that doesn't mean you're going to do anything about it, it just means that that's why you chose them in the first place as a friend is that you were attracted to something about them. Doesn't mean that you want them over your partner. If your partner has a friendship with someone else it doesn't mean that they want that person over you. The idea of debating friendships between men and women in terms of there is is there attraction or isn't there attraction I think is kind of a naive and childish way to look at it. Of course there's some attraction in many friendships that are just friendships of course there is we'd be crazy and naive to assume otherwise. The question isn't can men and women be friends the question is are they willing to just be friends. Your partner's loyalty isn't defined by how many people they are not attracted to. Your partner's loyalty is defined by the amount of people they can be attracted to and still be loyal to you. Still be in the relationship still be faithful that to me is what loyalty is truly about. There's no win there's no award in someone never being attracted to other people that just means that you're the only person in the world they're attracted to and by default they're with you. If they could be attracted to many people and still choose you that's genuine loyalty because now they're sticking around by choice not because they haven't found anything better. The way that I answered this when someone asked me last week can men and women just be friends is I said if you can drink 10 shots of whiskey and at the end of those 10 shots neither one of you attempts to sleep with the other person yes you can just be friends. That's not to say that there isn't any attraction between these two people that is to say that even once they've lost their inhibitions even once they're in a state of weakness where they could be vulnerable to doing something if even then they make the decision that no this is going to be platonic there isn't going to be more between us then you know that you have someone who really is just in a friendship whether it's you whether it's your partner whether it's anyone else I stand by that test drink responsibly my friends. What number is this Jameson? If you like this video go check out these two we have the ask me anything video which I did very recently and will you ever find the one let me know what you think in the comments