Homeschooling Through Changing Life Seasons Interview with Bev

hi everyone it's Sherry from our life homeschooling I am so excited to share with you an interview that I have with my friend be we got together and talked about homeschooling through different seasons of Life Bev was the very first interview I had years ago when I started my YouTube channel so it was great to catch up with her and just talk about how things have changed and what her homeschool looks like now so let's dive into this conversation with my name is Sherry Christian wife and thankful mom to 10 incredible kids I'm the author of the blog and YouTube channel our life homeschooling where I share homeschooling encouragement for everyday moms I believe that motherhood is Ministry and homeschooling is simply an extension of parenting my passion is to cheer on other moms who are at home doing the most important work of all raising the Next Generation for the glory of God hi Bev hey Sherry how are you good thank you so much for joining me it is a joy to be back here yes you were the very first interview I did which was I want to say like three was it three years ago no it was four years ago four years ago so any of you that wna search back on YouTube and find that or maybe I'll just link it so people can see I feel like people love that kind of thing seeing what happened several years ago even when it was like my first and we were both awkward and that's just what people love although it was slightly less intimidating then because you had zero viewers couple thousand so I feel like pressure is on no I just hope that whatever I say is honoring to the Lord and that's all that matters yes that's right yes and you're in a completely different season now than you were four years ago I mean things change so much but why don't we just we'll start kind of at the very beginning again and you can reintroduce yourself to my viewers and tell them what attracted you to homeschooling all right well my name is Bev I've been married for 18 years to my best friend Mark and we have seven children aging from one yearold to 16 and I've now been homeschooling for 10 years so even thinking about that sounds so me um so what attracted me to homeschooling um it's actually interesting because if you had asked me 15 years ago um or even maybe even earlier than that if I would ever homeschool my children I probably would have laughed in your face um I think the words at one point ignorantly came out of my mouth that I would never homeschool my children because I didn't want them to be weird and I genuinely believed that I was I was very um I just wasn't exposed to homeschooling and had lots of wrong Impressions about it and at the time when the Lord started to change our mindset we my husband and I were both volunteering at our church youth group and I remember the day so clearly um I was talking to a young man and he was just very poised really easy to talk to um was considerate and very socially Adept and I said to him like oh where do you go to school and he said well I'm schooled and I was like no you're not yes I am and I just remember being so surprised and that's when the Lord started to really tune my heart to the possibility of homeschooling and then Flash Forward um in our marriage Mark and I have hosted eight exchange students so even before we had kids when our kids were really young we had these students in our home who we just adored and treated as our own kids and they would leave our house at six o'clock to go to school and because they were exchange students they were involved in all the sports and they would not come home until six or 7 o'clock at night and then they would wow be failed with the rest of the evening doing school workor or studying for exams and I just remember thinking I I don't want to lose my children to a system where they're gone all day long like I missed these students and then flash forward to when I was a mother of my own I just didn't want to pass my kids off so that someone else could enjoy them right yes I completely relate to that I felt the same way when we started with Tai I just the thought of him being gone all day when he was only five it just seemed so long it's such a long time and they're so little and even for because a lot of our exchange students were high schoolers and I remember they would just come to us at night and just want to talk to us and want to be friends with us and I remember thinking like let alone being five but when they're in the most impressionable years of their lives in high school that's when I want them home with me so that we can have those conversations and even now having teenagers just thinking of the amount of time and attention that I can give to my kids and not feel like I'm wrestling a a school whether it's a Christian school or or a public school um I don't have to necessarily share them the way that I would if they were you know sent out to an institution to learn right all day long yeah that is one thing I love about homeschooling teenagers is the impromptu impromptu conversations that happen so naturally throughout the day and I'm there for them and I I just love that it's just it's treasured it's something that I'm so thankful for so you have can you tell again what are the ages you have now so I have seven children five girls and two boys and they are 16 14 12 10 eight five and then one okay and so your kids that are in school your what grades are they so kindergarten 2nd fourth sixth freshman in high school and then a sophomore in high school oh wow you have six in school yeah and two high schoolers oh my okay so you are in a completely different season of life now than when we talked last what does it look like for you just a typical day in the season having high schoolers and some Elementary and then also having baby Kate it is a lot of plate spinning at all times and I feel like when I can keep them spinning well things go really smoothly and we have a good routine and then when one plate drops I'm like like everything falls apart we need to like realign the plates so I can juggle them again um but that's okay it's okay to like reset reset the plates every now and again so we start every day at 7:30 and that is like when I become teacher mom you know at that time when I put on my teacher hat but I start the day at 6 o'clock when my husband and I wake up together and we typically eat breakfast breakfast together and then I have my time with the Lord where I am just quiet before the Lord and can read my Bible and pray which is one of those things that can feel cliche but it is such a like spiritual pulse for me to just real heart and remind me of what I'm doing and even as the Lord will tell the Israelites like you are not fighting this battle like I am fighting for you and just reminding myself of that every morning is just very important because it's amazing how quickly we forget that and we try to do it by Our Own Strength which then is accompanied by a lot of frustration and fear and all of those things so I do have some early risers who are just very gung-ho appreciate the homeschool model of being able to get their school done by 11 but if they are awake they are not allowed to talk to me like when I I mean within reason they're not allowed to ask me questions because I just really value that time as sacred and I tell them like if you want me to be the best mom that I just need to have this quiet time where you can be around you can be present but I like this time is sacred for me so that is like between six o'clock until whenever the baby wakes up but then at 7 at 7:30 we are all down at the couch and that is when we like start our morning meeting and at that time we are reading the Bible together we well first we just go over the basic plan for the day like it's amazing how that just sets the trajectory of the day when the kids know what they know what's happening um we review who what chore rotation we're on so the kids know exactly what the expectations are um if the kids have tennis lessons that's going to affect our morning so just like reminding everyone so we're all on the same page and then we always read the Bible together where we just read a chapter of the Bible and we break it up into verses so all my readers are practicing reading the Bible aloud um but also just allowing us to all be on the same page and study God's word together and then we always finish by going over and reviewing the memory verse that we're studying and we're currently memorizing Colossians 3 1-17 and it's been months that we've been memorizing and we finally got to verse 17 and it feels like such Victory um but I really want to encourage like every mother that I speak to that children can memorize God's word yes my five-year-old has memorized Colossians 3 1 through 17 in completion she and she stumbles over her words and it's the cutest thing um but I that's something that the Lord taught me when my oldest was young and I almost found out by accident but it is a treasure for our family that we memorize chunks of scripture together and she doesn't always know what it means like she doesn't understand sexual immorality at this point but she will someday and the word of is already on her heart yes anyway that was a very long introduction to our time um but then once we leave there we go on to breakfast and the kids each have a different um morning routine where two of them make breakfast two of them do chickens and Bunny Duty and then two of them either wash sheets or throw in a load of laundry and that rotation switches every week so the kids are learning how to make breakfast they're learning how to take their home um and they're learning how to take care of the animals outside and then I'm just around helping with either the baby or just popping myself in wherever is needed um and then we all eat breakfast together and oftentimes we'll do memory work unless I'm just really tired and sometimes I just while they're eating breakfast and then around 9:00 that's when we transition to like the first school chunk of the day and I this year start with my re my non-readers or the ones who are beginner readers and my older kids are really not allowed to interrupt during that time because I want to give that designated time to the kids and during that time my older kids are working on their independent work and if they have questions they really just have to you know try to figure f it out on their own or wait until I'm done with the littles until they can ask me those questions and then when they are done I often will send them to do independent play and then work with my older kids while Kate is napping yes that sounds really similar to us exactly um we have morning time independent work then we break for lunch and um oh I forgot chores morning time chores independent work break for lunch and then the afternoon we read together but very similar yeah same and I I typically read during lunch so when I'm making lunch for the kids I will eat as I'm going and then while they're all putting food in their mouth and don't want to talk I we'll read aoud to them so we're currently reading um Mrs Frisbee and the Rats of nim oh I've never read that one it is so good and we're learning all about just different um yeah I won't I didn't even give it away we're I won't tell you what it's about but it's just really and the kids love always begging for one more chapter well looking back to where you were it is probably hard to remember but where you were four years ago to today what would you say has changed having older kids as opposed to when you were younger they were all little and um you know now it is different because you have kids that are a lot more independent it's interesting because I was looking back at my last video four years ago and I was surprised by how much is the same just because when you are a homeschooler you will hold High the things that are most valuable to you so in terms of morning time um table time which we'll often do in the afternoon with the kids um Bible memorization um Bible time together those things have not changed like the daily flow of our day but the one thing that has changed is gone are the days when all my kids do everything together and been a hard transition but thanks to like dear friends like yourself who have gone before me I was prepared for it and ready for it I often quote to myself a quote by um Corey ten booom that says um hold things in your hand Loosely because it hurts less when the Lord pries them open oh so true yes and I just remember when I try to hold on so tightly to my kids or even to a season of life I just remember like no this is good like this is part of their growth in and rather than resist it and become bitter or just live in the past like I want to be excited for my kids and excited for the things that the Lord has for them but in a lot of ways that takes the discipline of my own heart to be willing to like switch my mindset in order to do that right right so like there are days like my two older kids have jobs so there are days where we come to do morning time and they're already off to work and I remember the first time I was like where are my kids but again like that the core part of our home school is the same but just then who is the FOC who's there is the one thing that has really been like a huge difference over the past four yeah I really do miss having our older boys for our read aloud time they're they're not there anymore and I do I miss it but at the same time you know it's they've moved on and they're doing things that are they've matured and it's good it's a good thing but it's sometimes hard for us as moms to accept because we love them right right yeah so what can you think of some mistakes that you have made because I think it's helpful when we share what we've learned to help other people avoid those same mistakes yes I how how much time do we have I feel I am constantly learning and still learning um and sometimes I know something but then I need to relearn it again and actually one thing happened today that I was like this is such a great example of something that I've learned and a mistake that I've made and a big part is knowing that when I am homeschooling that is my primary Ministry that is the primary thing that I can do my kids are where I need to be and if I was a teacher in the public school system that would be my job I would go to school and that would be my focus and a lot of times I try to balance other things or even will get distracted and focus on other things and then my kids need me and I get annoyed and frustrated me and just today like everything was quiet so I was like oh I'm gonna listen to a message from a friend and so they were all quiet working around me so I'm taking lunch and I put in an earbud and started listening to a message and then one of my kids was like hey mom um can I ask you a question and I was like no I'm doing something I it probably sounded not as kind as that um but I I kind of reacted at their desire to need me and it was very the Lord was very kind I'm able to like switch gears a lot quicker but in the moment I was like I I'm actually really sorry like this message is secondary and I responded to you like you were interrupting me when I was in a conversation and you had no like you didn't know that I was listening to a message I had an earbud in but I think often when we try to do too many things at once we're going to set ourselves up for failure so I learned don't do do the budget during The Homeschool day yeah not a good idea don't don't reply to like important emails during The Homeschool day or what I could have done is just said hey guys there's a message that I'm going to listen to please don't interrupt me and I could have just clearly communicated that but I didn't and I ended up needing to repent to my kids and apologize to them for really them doing nothing wrong right so I think just having proper perspective of like that there will be a time for that and to just take a deep breath but also realize like when you do mess up the most humbling and gospel thing that you can do is to just apologize to your kids and them like you're right I put this message before you and I'm sorry that was not right of me and they're so forgiving they are so sometimes I feel like more forgiving than I can be yeah but it was yeah it was just a good very timely reminder to me like what is my Ministry and hold that high yeah yes yeah I had a similar incident recently I was out in the kitchen and I picked up something I think it was one of my sewing tools or something and it was broken and I was just immediately so annoyed because as parents how many times have we had our kids break things that we love and right away um brenley was there and I was like if you're going to borrow this I don't mind but just you have to put it away and I didn't yeah I didn't say it that nicely and she had it wasn't her and and it wasn't broken but when I first looked at it it looked broken so I had to go back and apologize and um yeah she was she I think kids really respond well to that because they see humility and um we're setting the example for them yeah and to just remember that we are we're all broken and we're all sinful and yes the what we're trying to to have them attain is not Perfection of mommy but it's Christ his righteousness and his Perfection so Mommy needs that Grace just like you and that's a really sweet reminder for all of us yes I agree can you give some tips on teaching multiple ages we're both in in this same category I feel right now because I have high schoolers and babies Toddlers and then elementary kids what would be your advice to a mom who has multiple ages while she's homeschooling do your best at the beginning to create self-propelled Learners yes I agree I learn this almost by necessity because um I shared in my last video my first one that that when I get pregnant I have debilitating sickness for about 20 weeks where I am pretty much in bed all day every day for 20 weeks and it was I mean it's challenging it has definitely been a um like the perfect picture of Love lays down his life for another like perfect love but it has been hard and I remember when the kids were little I could just kind of put them in a room with toys and lay on the couch with my puke bucket um but as I got older and we homeschooling I felt a wholly responsibility to do well before my children um but I also was was incapable of giving them 100% of who I was so I just remember laying on the couch and I would hand them a workbook and say okay can you go work on this workbook page and they would go and come back and they would have accomplished it and in that kind of trial and error sickness and pregnancies I learned how how much my kids were capable of and how by me doing everything for them I was actually holding them back from what they were capable of accomplishing and not only that but they had a joy of being able to accomplish they were able to um take pride in their work and take ownership of their education and maybe they just pied me but they enjoy it they they had joy in bringing their accomplished work back to me so from a very young age with my oldest I just need once I taught her to read I was kind of like okay go learn now and I became more of their coach as they got older rather than spoon feeding them information so that was new for me because being in the public school system I think that is what I expected to do when I first started homeschooling but it really showed me that my job is to teach them to read and to teach them how to learn and then really once you are at that point I'm just a really a cheerleader a coach um I definit faor have questions um but I also tell them like I don't know everything sometimes mommy has to research something online or go to the library and if I can do that you can do that too right right so I've given them the tools they all have our librarian's email address so they can email the librarian if um or just books that they want to pull um the other thing is something silly but my husband gave me this idea when my kids were younger because I would I always felt like everyone needed me at the same time and I would get easily overwhelmed and he just took he we bought these wooden blocks they're like one inch wooden blocks and he spray painted them red green and yellow so what happens is they each have these blocks and we've used these on and off just to like reset the expectations but when a child is doing work and they have no questions they put the green block on top and then if the child has a question but it's not urgent they'll put the Yellow Block on top and if they have a question that they can't move on with what they're working on until I help them they put the red block on top and it's nice because rather than saying like Mom Mom Mom M they just have these nonverbal cues to tell me like I actually have an urgent question so if you could get here as soon as possible and all I to do is like glaze the room and see who needs me yeah wow that's a great idea that is really really great that's something practical that people could could really use well tell me then um we're getting low on time here tell me what how you find the joy in homeschooling you've been homeschooling for a long time um and so it's um you've been through the highs and lows and um and you're still homeschool and you still love it so how do you find the joy this one I am super passionate about because I just feel like when we are called to something we as moms I think or just as women can believe the lie that our feelings are truth and I often have to remind myself and just people I talked to like a a feeling is real but it doesn't make it true so just because the feeling is real does it make it true and I think that it can be easy to get frustrated get overwhelmed and then start believing things that aren't true and I just really love the idea of like wanting to be joyful in the work that the Lord has for me and wanting to know truth so I speak a lot of Truth to myself and it reminds me of um in the scriptures in Philippians 4 where it tells us to set our mind on things that are true and Noble and holy and pure because it works when you remind yourself of Truth so even today in the midst of that um trial I had with with my son in that moment I wanted what I wanted but I had to tell myself no Bev you need to discipline your heart and your mind to do the right thing even though you don't feel like doing the right thing and when you do the next thing and the next right thing then Joy follows so I think just walking in truth and then reminding yourself of the truth of the gospel and of the mission of what we're doing and reminding yourself of the purpose of that is ultimately going to shape your mind into then feeling those things but obedience is not always joyful but there is joy in obedience yes the fruit of it the fruit of it is is joyful yes um and I was going to share a quote that I have from Amy carmichel that I often repeat to myself too okay Amy carmichel said Joy Is Not Mere jolliness Joy is perfect acquiescence acceptance and rest in God's will whatever comes and that's such a sweet quote for me because I think sometimes we attribute Joy with jolliness and we think if I'm going to have joy in motherhood or joy in homeschooling then I must feel Jolly all the time and that's not true I think we need to remind ourselves that Joy is doing the good work that the Lord has called us to and then honoring the one to whom we worship and when we know that and con conform our minds to that mission then the joy of Christ which is available to us is there but that doesn't mean you spend all day laughing or that you spend all day with a smile on your face but it does mean that you can have the joy of knowing that you're doing what Christ has called you to yes and what's pleasing to him yes that you're honoring him and pleasing him in your obedience doing what he's called you to do yes that's so good well thank you so much Bev this has been fun for me I always love catching up with you and um I know this is going to be encouraging to so many people um it's always encouraging to see other everyday homeschool moms just Faithfully doing the work that God's called us to so thank you for sharing your story and I'll see you soon awesome thanks so much Sherry glad to be here thank you so much for joining me today I hope this encouraged you I do one video a week on homeschooling encouragement for everyday moms I'll see you next week