How To Spot The 9 Traits Of BORDERLINE Personality Disorder BPD vs BIPOLAR (Real Examples!)

Hey guys, what's the difference between bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder also known as BPD. Also, are all women or people with bipolar or BPD narcissists? And perhaps most importantly is there treatment? How can you help her? Is she worth it? If you're new to my channel my name is Anna Jorgensen welcome to just the tip Tuesday. So just before we get into the signs that she might have bipolar versus borderline personality disorder I just need to disclose that I am not a licensed psychologist or therapist and I did do research on this from the experts in the field particularly for this video Dr. Tracey Marks. So thank you Dr. Tracey Marks. So according to the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders that's a mouthful right there these are the signs that she might have bipolar disorder and most of these actually do overlap with borderline personality disorder but there is a distinct difference which I'll go into a little bit later as we go through the signs. So according to the big bible of mental disorders someone would need to have at least five of these next nine traits to qualify for a diagnosis of either bipolar or borderline personality disorder and stay tuned because I am going to go into a little bit on the narcissism at the end or somewhere in here. Stay around. So again according to this big bible of mental disorders I'm going to actually just read you the description of borderline personality disorder. Yes borderline personality disorder is a pattern of unstable relationships self-image and emotional expression marked by impulsivity beginning in early adulthood as indicated in five or more of the following. You might want to score yourself along here. I was like oh oh that used to be me. One frantic efforts to avoid real or perceived abandonment. Example you need to postpone or change plans because something important has come up. This doesn't happen very often but when it has it is legit but she totally freaks out and thinks that you are actually trying to leave her and she goes into some sort of hysterics. So that's an example of that one. Number two a pattern of intense and unstable interpersonal relationships characterized by extremes of ideation and devaluation. That's a mouthful. Okay what does this look like? In real world terms an example of this might be how one day she is gushing about how amazing you are and how lucky she is and how she wants to be with you forever and the next day you do the slightest thing wrong that you probably don't even know you've done wrong and even if she tells you you've done it wrong it doesn't seem like it's something that you really think is wrong. It might have been just a error or not understanding her needs and she flies off the handle and calls you a stupid loser and thinks that she's too good for you and why is she even with you. Extremes, extremes. Three, kind of along these lines is a marked sense of identity disturbance with persistent sense of unstable self-image or sense of self. Again that's kind of a whole head full of information right there. So what does this look like in real life? In real life this kind of looks like the opposite of the last one where she's you know either fully giving you credit beyond what is realistic or completely devaluing you. So instead of it being addressed or directed towards you it's directed towards herself. So she might think she's one day she's super out of your league and she's maybe even a bit you know conceited and acting all that princess behavior and the next day she is feeling like she's not good enough. She might just have like a bad hair day and that's enough to trigger her into thinking that she's ugly and why are you with her and it could go on into some great big drama. Be a drama mama. Don't be a drama mama. Number four, impulsivity in at least two areas, make it two, that are bonus point if you know what movie that came from. Okay so in at least two areas that are potentially self-harmful. So this would look like in the real world where she might to be go on some kind of you know drinking binge or drinking and driving or maybe even doing drugs or overeating or spending when she's on her last paycheck and has no savings. Anything where it's reckless and irresponsible behavior that will have potential future consequences that are not good no es bueno that's definitely one of the signs. Now keep in mind that you need to have or she needs to have five of these signs to be classified as one of these disorders and again, I'll get into shortly what the difference is so that you can know which condition or disorder she might have and how to help her and when you can and when you can't help her stay tuned for that. Number five, recurrent self-harm or threats of self-harm. Now that one can go right to the extreme and I can't actually give you an example of that here because I will probably get flagged. So, I will if I'm allowed I'll put it in the comment below watch for number five in the comment below and otherwise, I did post the details of this with an example well, you don't actually need an example but in the blog that goes along with this video so you can look for that if you're interested. But generally, the most extreme of self-harm. Okay, number six unstable or reactive mood. So, this could last for a few minutes a few hours or a few days and I'll go into a little bit more detail on the length of behavior like the time this person might be in the behavior and what that means in terms of distinguishing what disorder they might have. So, in this case basically mood swings so might be you know super happy on top of the world and you know there's no triggers whatsoever and then the next thing you know whether it's hours later or days later for extended periods of time there is the shift to sadness or depression or anger or you know just the highs the extremes between like super positive emotion and super negative emotion whatever forms that might look like so an example would be one day she might be going back to the let's say you're late or you need to change plans let's say you're late so you've only been late maybe once before and it was no big deal she's super happy to see you another time she just flies off the handle and completely loses her temper and is completely irrational and it shouldn't be a big deal so big mood swings. So, the next one is chronic feelings of emptiness and an example of how this might play out in real life is if she picks fights that are really for no reason but sometimes when people feel empty inside they need extreme emotion to feel like they're alive so she may again go to extremes of either really risky behavior or starting a fight and trying to escalate even though there's no real reason to but that's what makes her feel alive. And the next one which kind of goes back to anger management is anger management. So, number eight yes, we're on eight which is an inappropriate or intense anger with an inability to control that anger. So, you know some of these you got to remember that oftentimes if we're tired or really overly stressed or we've got stuff going on in our world any of us might engage in some of these behaviors some of the time but you're looking for a pattern of at least five or more of these behaviors consistently. So, in terms of anger there are appropriate times to feel and express anger keyword being appropriate and you need to be able to express it appropriately but if she is or has bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder then she may express anger in inappropriate or exaggerated ways. So, you know she might be on yelling she might scream or slam doors or throw things or it might even go beyond that. So, that's something to definitely pay attention to even if she doesn't have all of the five signs that's still a big red flag even if she doesn't have one of these conditions. So, you need to be able to discuss conflict in ways that are healthy and appropriate. Discuss conflict discuss disagreement etc and so forth. If she's never able to do that and it's not just because today's a really, really crappy day for her because of whatever she had a car accident and she got fired so, multiple things that could add to the stress but if this is just something that's ongoing then that's definitely a red flag and you should watch my red flags video. Definitely and if it goes into physical then you definitely need to reach out for professional help and possibly even call a crisis line. Get help. Okay, number nine I'm going to read number nine because it's a lot of words. Here we are. Transient stress-related paranoid ideation or severe disassociative symptoms. Yeah, exactly so, it's kind of a micro psychotic episodes. So, an example of this could be all right, here's a good example. Dissociative could be let's say you did something really, really wrong in a relationship that is not allowed like cheating. Let's say you cheated on her and got caught red-handed and there's no way that it's just her being paranoid but she acts like nothing happened. She has no reaction whatsoever disassociative, right? Disassociating from the situation and appears as though it hasn't affected her. The opposite of that would be the paranoid part could look like anyway in real life where you haven't done anything wrong you haven't cheated you look you're as loyal as the year 2020 is long and you've never given her any reason whatsoever to think that you might have cheated on her or even looked at another girl but she is constantly excessively paranoid that you want to cheat on her or are cheating on her or are going to cheat on her and she acts in accordance with that belief. So, she's maybe checking your phone all the time or hacking into your email or hiring a private investigator that only happened once and I canceled the call right away I swear it's in my book if you want to read about it. Anyways, turns out I was right I was not paranoid that's my story and I'm sticking to it. Okay, so anyway now to the big difference between borderline and bipolar. The big difference is in the duration of the episode the duration of behavior. So, think about it like either you're on a roller coaster that would be borderline personality disorder. So, these episodes might last up to two weeks or longer if they're in a depressive state or a week or longer if they're in a manic state. So, these are ongoing this is like the slow mood changes whereas bipolar are quick mood shifts. So, this is like a bungee jump and so it might be in a matter of minutes or hours that the mood shifts from one extreme to another. And that brings me to the reason why you're probably attracted or potentially at least minimally or partially attracted to someone like this because they're very exciting to be with they're often very charismatic and spontaneous and they have all of these traits that seem really exciting on the surface but there are healthier way to get your kicks than being with someone who is emotionally damaged. So, that kind of brings us into treatment. So, can these people get treatment? Maybe. So, here's the general consensus from what I've learned is that bipolar is primarily treated with medication with possible behavioral therapy on the side and borderline personality disorder is primarily treated with a special type of behavioral therapy with possibly medication on the side. So, they can overlap a bit. However, what you need to know is that narcissists at this point in time there is no cure. So, with someone who has these and is a narcissist as well then you're basically managing behavior but there's no guarantee and someone who has bipolar disorder or BPD, borderline personality disorder might not be a narcissist and they may be able to come out of these behaviors with proper treatment. But the question you need to ask yourself is will they get treatment? Can they get treatment? What can you do to help them get the appropriate treatment? And perhaps the most important question if that's not possible if those three aren't possible why are you attracting and attracted to women who are emotionally damaged? So, that's a question you might want to ask yourself. Watch my playlist on emotionally damaged women and narcissists and you may want to watch my playlist on self-sabotage and you definitely want to take my wake up to love program because it'll help you not only answer those questions within yourself but become the kind of man that you want to be to get the kind of woman you want to get without compromising yourself as a man. So, I'll put that link below. Thank you for being here and definitely watch those next. Watch those, yeah, watch those. There they are over there I'll move over here so you can see them. See you next time.