"Man fällt anderen nicht ins Wort!“ 🚫🗣️ | Gedanken(spazier)Gänge | Stefan Verra

You don't say a word to other people. You let them speak their mind. That was the statement of some analysts in connection to a political discussion. I was also invited and said on German television, if we don't interrupt other people, something very important will be lost. And I would like to share a few thoughts with you about that. Right at the beginning I say, this may be arguable, so please write your comments below, write your thoughts on it. And maybe even if I have a thought error. And that was the case on German television, the election in Hessen. Nancy Faeser, the German interior minister, and Boris Rhein discussed it with each other. Tarek Al-Wazir was also there, the third candidate of the Greens. In any case, the three of them discussed it and Nancy Faeser and Boris Rhein often fell into each other's trap, so that during the broadcast he turned around and said to her, do you want to talk now or can I talk? So he was really pissed off. And then, of course, it was analyzed and people said, yes, you really don't do that. At first glance, that's also true. It's annoying, especially the way Nancy Faeser did it. Maybe I'll say something about that later. But overall, I have to say, something is lost if we don't interrupt other people. But one more thing. When we have children, a child, if he wants to say something because something is in his heart, then it spills over and can't hold on to itself because it's angry, because it's full of joy, because it's maybe afraid, because it has an idea. It spills over with enthusiasm, with joy. And of course it interrupts the other person, the mother, the father, whoever. But that means the child doesn't have the emotions in the fence and with that the emotions also come out without hesitation. Now the child comes to kindergarten and already learns that you don't just scream out if you have a thought. In school there is the rule, if you want to say something, then show up. And in elementary school or elementary school, when you look at children, you notice how they show up when they have an idea, a thought. They show up like this, they jump up and down on the chair and show up like this because they are overwhelmed by emotions. And now the following happens. The teacher ignores the children. Of course he wants to tell the children, wait a minute, here are the rules, one after the other. And that makes total sense superficially, because you can't just let 20, 25 children scream at you. Full understanding of this. The point is, however, that something is lost with the child, namely letting go and full enthusiasm. So the child learns, when I just go over to emotions, that is not asked now. It is only asked when the teacher gives me the command, I can say it out now. Is it logical that this then suppresses the emotions a little, yes, sometimes brings them down? And you can observe that in school, how it is later, first someone shows up, then there is this clapping, you know that, and then there is the waving. And in later years they show up, do a little like this and then put their head down like this. And at the same time, some teachers wonder why there is no more enthusiasm in the class. Yes, if I am only allowed to show my emotions, if the other says, and now you are allowed to show it on command, then we must not be surprised when emotionality is lost. In the company it is also like this, no one just screams out. Most of the companies have already given up their enthusiasm until then, and that is actually the case. When I look at meetings, when I look at conferences, the enthusiasm, the enthusiasm that some people have, it does not focus on the meeting, but most people, at least in my experience, are happy when the meeting is over. And if you are someone who is still fully enthusiastic and likes to let it out, you are happier, you are happier. Incredibly great. In my life I have simply learned that there are many areas where I can let out my emotions. And it is dangerous when companies say it would be unprofessional if an employee is full of enthusiasm and says, I have a great idea now, please let me go. And then you are looked at like that and learn at the latest after the third or fourth meeting, no, I prefer to suppress that. But so much is lost next to it, so much enthusiasm is lost. And that is the thought that I just said on the show. Of course I am in favor of not everyone just yelling out, that is logical. But if you never allow someone who is full of euphoria to just yell out, say his joy, maybe sometimes his annoyance, yes, then on the other hand I must not get upset that the emotionality is completely missing. Of course, this brings me to the subordinate to politics. We get excited when one politician speaks to the other, sometimes we get excited too, but on the other hand we want emotionality, we want credible, we want authentic politicians. And on the other hand, they should please speak all the way there and let the other person speak to the end. And now I come to an important point, we never do that. So who believes that it would be best to always let the other person come to an end and then to start yourself. Do you know what it is? It is the most soulless communication you can imagine. Because usually it works like this, a person says something and you notice when this person comes to an end. You just noticed with me, the voice goes down, the head goes down. And the moment the first signals come, now I come to an end, the other person already starts talking. And he also sends out the signals when he says something and then comes to an end. Then not only at the end, but when these signals of ending come, the next person already starts talking. And yes, the more emotional a communication is, the faster this change is. But it is never the case that we wait until the end, short break and then the next person speaks. You might do that in discussions that have a moderator, who gives the floor and so on. But it is also insanely unemotional. If you look in the pub, if you are emotional in a meeting, if you talk to your family, you will see that the person communicates culture-independently, always so that the end of a statement and the beginning of the next statement are intertwined. There is very often no break at all. And that is exactly what emotionality conveys. That means, we don't need to yell at someone. We don't need to constantly fall into the other person's words. Not that. But please, it is completely okay if you become emotionally enthusiastic in a conversation, that you take the end as an occasion to say your first remarks. And I think it would be important if we gave this to the children, that there are areas where you actually let the other person speak, but it is sometimes incredibly good when the children simply say their opinion with full enthusiasm. So, I'll summarize it again. Emotionality happens because we communicate with each other and not serially behind each other. And if anyone gets upset now, look for euphoria and enthusiasm in the corner. You won't find anything. I'm curious what you think about it. I would like to hear your opinion about it and please share it with those people who believe that it is always the primacy of letting someone speak that would be the best. Please share it. I'm looking forward to your opinions. I will read them.