RHONY Erin Lichy On Ubah & Jessel Drama, Brynn's Divorce Comments, Her Backstory Removal, & More

I just don't like that word getting thrown around. Like when you get a divorce, like it just it stings. So for me, it's just like the word usage. Once I heard that from Abe, I was like, oh, so excited to chat with you in person. I know I spoke like months ago when the show first was about to premiere. Yeah. And now so much has changed in the 10 episodes since. I mean, what's it been like for you watching it back? And what's been the most surprising thing so far? What's surprising sometimes is like how we're edited and how things are different in our experience than they are, you know, on the show, and obviously they do what they have to do. They only have like 42 minutes to like tell a story. But there's so much missing context. And that sometimes drives me a little crazy. But from your storyline, what are you hoping? What were you hoping that they did include that they didn't? That may have they didn't show any of my personal backstory. There's a scene where I take my sister dress shopping and buy her her dress, because, you know, obviously, I don't know if people even know this, but my dad was a single father with my four younger half siblings. And so I took her dress shopping. There was a scene where my dad and I talk about like how I grew up and why I am the way I am. I take a lot of responsibility for my family and friends because I had to be responsible at a very young age. And all of that is out from my own personal story. So, I mean, I'm sure frustrating because there's so many so much focus on other people's backstory. I'm the only one that didn't get to reveal, you know, my upbringing, the only one. You know, why was it so important for you to kind of call out Jessel in these these past few episodes about her upbringing and, you know, her kind of maybe almost painting a picture that wasn't? Saying I grew up with nothing is, I think, a very strong statement. Growing up comfortably is something different or middle class is something different than growing up with nothing. Jessel tries and not in a nonmalicious way, but she tries to connect with people through comparison. And sometimes the comparison just isn't right. And in that moment, especially at dinner, I was really feeling for Cy. And I mean, Brynn wasn't there, but even for Brynn, because they really had this struggle that is not comparable to what Jessel went through. She had two loving parents that put her through college. You know, she had a soft landing pad if ever she were to fall. And the other two did not. So I just didn't feel like it was a right way to compare. You know, I didn't sit there and say, well, my mother was a single mother as she was with me when, you know, she and my father got divorced and I was alone with my mom. She had all these struggles like I wasn't sitting there comparing because it wasn't it wasn't a comparable situation. You know, it doesn't mean that Jessel didn't have struggle. It didn't I didn't mean that she was fed with a silver spoon. You know, it was just different. And and without her meaning to, it came off very insensitive. Like Jessel just sometimes wasn't clear, like even when it comes to the sex stuff. Right. Like her sex life. She brings it up to us in jest. Yeah. You know, like, hey, like we haven't had sex in a year and a half. And so we think it's like a playful thing. I actually didn't know until watching back that she went through four rounds of IVF. I had no idea. I had no clue. She told me she did IVF, but I never knew the the the severity of what she had gone through was never discussed. You know, it's a very different situation when someone sits down with you and says, I went through a really hard time. Yeah. And therefore, my husband and I haven't been able to connect sexually. That's a different conversation. Not totally different than not having sex for a year and a half because you have toddlers running around. Yeah. And it's like we haven't had sex in a year and a half. Ha ha. Like that's how it was delivered. So there needs to be a level of accountability with how you deliver messaging and then not it's not fair to get so angry at the person who's receiving the information because they're receiving it the way it's given. I think she definitely takes accountability now. She and I actually are at a really great place. Like we're friends. We're good. I think she's a very, very sweet and lovely girl. I think sometimes she lacks some self-awareness, as do I, as do everyone. Right. Like I've I've learned a lot about, you know, the comments that I make. Maybe I should be a little bit more empathetic and easygoing sometimes. But I think Jaisal now sees the way that she delivers information is very different than maybe how she feels. And maybe she should be a bit more forthright or explain things to us because I'm not I mean, I'm not a mind reader. Right. It's the same thing with like the job. Like, oh, you don't support women because you don't know that I have a job. How would I know that you're working if you don't tell me? What did you make of her checklist on you? I think it's unfair considering like Cy gave her a lot this season and I kind of felt like I was the scapegoat throughout all of it because maybe because I am a little bit lighter and maybe she's not afraid of me. I don't really know, but it felt a little unfair. Do you feel like maybe she comes after you or has a problem with you because you ask her those tough questions or kind of call her out? Probably. I mean, and I do it from a from a place of just trying to understand her and also not accepting like the BS side of it. Do I think she's meaning to be that way? Absolutely not. I don't think her intention is negative. I think she's a good girl. You all are thrust into this. You've never done this before. Do you feel like a lot of people did have? I mean, some people did have their walls up because maybe you're just getting comfortable. Do you think going into maybe next season, it'll be completely different? Completely different. I also will know people better. Like I'll know not to take Uber's phone. You know, like I didn't know that that would have triggered her. And I'll know, you know, I didn't know Jenna that well in the beginning. So like when I went, for example, to go bring her soup and she told me all this stuff, and I'm also hearing from the other side and from some of the other girls, all these sort of negative things about her and thinking that maybe she's playing us and we're trying, you know, how all that stuff was a gift giving. So I don't I don't know yet. Like, I don't I'm not that close with everybody yet. Now I see a whole other sort of side. I have much better understanding of who each one is individually and how I would interact with them, who I actually want to be friends with, who I don't. So it's just a different it's a different thing. It's going to be a whole different thing. I know you talked a little bit about this on Watch What Happens Live, the comments that you made about Jenna and telling the group that, you know, she only wants to fly first class. Yeah. Yeah. Look, I think there was missing context. There was there was more conversation that was had at that time. The other thing that people don't see is that everyone knew she flew first. I wasn't delivering any new news. I was just saying it on TV because I knew it was going to be shown in our conversation with her. And I wanted it to be, like, clarified in front of the girls. That being said, I should have given her more support because she was in a vulnerable state, especially when she told me. And though I do think she wanted to be comfortable, I know how hard and I know how she like how hard it is for her to to be around girls in bathing suits. But I didn't know that then, like I've learned also a lot about her through her confessionals. You know, I mean, she told me like I knew her teeth were falling out, but like I didn't realize the level of her skin condition, you know. And the other thing also is that Bryn had to fly back to New York from St. Bart's just to fly back to Anguilla. So it felt like a double standard. So a lot of us were like, well, why why does she get to go early? But Bryn has to leave St. Bart's early just to fly with us. We thought we all had to be together. Sure. So that's also where that was coming from as the group as well. I know that you and Uwe have been friends for a while. So when the whole phone frenzy fiasco happened and she, you know, snatched her sunglasses, like this was like a reaction I didn't see coming. But watching it back, knowing that she always has to check in with her family. Do you understand it a little bit better? Or is it not? Everybody speaks the same language in terms of like the way things are delivered and the way they're received. Like I thought I was saying something clearly and you'll see it unfold. But she didn't take it that way. Like it wasn't clear to her that I had her phone. And I also thought we were pranking. Like I didn't think it was going to be that deep. Now, knowing and looking back now, I know not to mess with her at all. Don't do a prank. But the other thing and I said this, I think I think I said this at the reunion or on the show, I can't even remember anymore. But like what if I had gotten upset for getting thrown in the pool? Like what if that would have really scared me? What if I had a past trauma of being thrown off board of a boat? Like you never really know. So you take chances with new friends. And in that situation, she took a chance, you know, like luckily it was fine. But, you know, I took a chance. It wasn't well received. I learned. I think you said in, you know, next week's episode that you were now maybe scared to be friends with her or to having that close of a friendship with her. Do you still feel that way? No, because I know her. Yeah. But I think at that time I was just so like taken aback by the reaction because she's so sweet most of the time. Like I knew she had like a spicy side. And even the way she talks about it after where she's like, I know I get hot, but like it's because I love you so much. And it's like it sounds like kind of crazy, but it's also I love her more for it. Yeah. No, you know, you get mad at the people that you care about the most. Exactly. Yeah. And because we love each other so much, it was such a real argument. And like there's a beauty in that, too. So we're good. Oh, yeah. We're good. But she does kind of bring up, you know, some past issues that obviously you and Bryn had with Abe and things like that. Watching that back now. Do you. That bothered me. It's still. And she knows that. It bothered me that she tried to get everyone to gang up on me. It bothered me that they were in the moke saying she talks shit about you to Jessel. Honestly, like I should not be the one getting in trouble for talking shit about Jessel, that there's a whole other group of people. I was the scapegoat and it was not fair. And I think Jessel will attest to that. I mean, now that everything's out in the open and people know who was talking, it really wasn't me. Did I was I part of it? Yes. Did I laugh sometimes? Yes. Do I think Jessel can say silly things? Absolutely. Do I think sometimes she misappropriates stories? For sure. I do feel like I was really a scapegoat. And I don't think it was fair to have everyone sort of gang up on me in that moment when it was like an isolated incident. Sure. You know, I spoke to Cy, I think got to be a few months ago at this point. And she teased to me that she and Bryn have like a really big falling out because she catches Bryn in a lie. In the trailer, you see my face, I'm like, yeah, all right, I'm going to have to stay tuned for that. Still think that Bryn's a social climber? No. I mean, look, Bryn, clearly she won't go certain places. Yeah. OK, so. Right. But I mean, she's I love I really love her. Yeah, we're very close. And I think she's a doll and I would really trust her with anything. Yeah. But you're around your husband. Yes. I can't sleep in bed with my husband. You can't sleep in bed with your husband? OK. But watching that scene back, do you understand that a little bit differently? How do you wish that was handled? And I say I've said this many times, like I just did not like I still don't think she should have used the word divorce. Yeah. Like that's just a triggering word for me, maybe because my parents got divorced when I was young. I just don't like that word getting thrown around. Like when you get a divorce, like it just it stings. So for me, it's just like the word usage. Once I heard that from Abe, I was like, oh, aside from it, like I don't care. Yeah. Has the show changed your marriage at all? Because, you know, so many people go into this and it does a little bit sense that like sometimes it was like you're you're like internalizing things too much, like we'll be, you know, like we used to just like hang out and watch a show. And now it's like sometimes like we'll air and I'll be like looking at comments, which I have to stop doing and getting sucked in or I'll be like talking to one of the girls about it. And, you know, I think like it takes away from our time. So I need to be better about that. But I actually think I actually think it's been kind of a positive because I realized how supportive he really has been. And he's just so great. And I'm just very happy. What do you think is the biggest misconception about you? That I am uptight and so not uptight. I'm like the chillest person. Do I do I play into things for the show? We're on. Yes. Like, hello, people. I'm really like a chill girl. I let things go the way you'll see throughout the season. I really don't hold on to things for a long time. I think the other thing that like I I actually feel like there's nothing wrong with having like a good upbringing or having like privileges that your parents provide you with. And I would never take that away from my parents. But things were not easy for me. You know, in a different way. And I think if we get another season, maybe you'll see that side and people understand me better. I'm sure you'll get another season. Well, Erin, thank you so much for stopping by. I appreciate it. Thank you for having me. Of course.