Aesop & Son (un-restored) "The Chicken and the Ducks"

Pogo stick get out of control, did it Junior? No, it's Romulus and Remus beating me up again. But they're only three years old. Yeah, but there's two of them and only one of me. One of them I could handle, but they always gang up on me. Well, it's like I always say, birds of a feather flock together. But Romulus and Remus aren't birds, they're little devils. But they do flock together. And that brings us to the fable called the chicken and the ducks. We all know the ducks fly south for the winter. But what about the chicken? If he's in the north, he stays north, freezing in a cold old coop. Now I know what Admiral Bird must have felt like. You think you got it bad, huh? You ought to sit on these cold eggs. Well, I've had it. Next year, I'm going to join up with the ducks and fly to Miami. And sure enough, when winter rolled around the following year, the ringneck mallards had a ringer in the ranks. Hey, my duck, what kind of a duck is that flying next to you? I don't know, I'll ask him. Hey, Jack, you a canvas back? No. A teal? No, no. Ask me if I'm a Rhode Island Red. Okay, you a Rhode Island Red? No, no, but thanks for asking. It's true, he was a Plymouth Rock. A week or so later, the migrating flock reached Florida and quickly came to roost on the shores of Miami Bay. That's when an emergency meeting of the exclusive Duck Club was held. My duck says we got a chicken amongst us. And this is a club for ducks. He's got to go. All in favor, say quack. My duck, throw him out. Ah, but that chicken was not chicken. Ducks, we'll have no more of that. I'm a bird and I've got just as much right here as the rest of you birds. It was then that Murdock and Feeney, who had been bosom pals since Egg Hood, made a solemn vow. And we shall join forces. And together never rest until that chick is chucked out. So they sent away for a diabolical contraption called a rocket chair. According to the instructions, all we got to do is get the chicken to sit in a chair, press button A, and he'll be launched into outer space. Here he comes now. Say, you look pretty tired. Yeah, why don't you sit down? Thank you, I will. Press button A. Well, I'll see you birds later. Something went wrong. Look, look, I'll sit in the chair, and we'll find out why this thing went awry. Okay, you comfy? Yeah, okay. Press button A. Button B! Ah, we should have got one with a C button. Maybe a Wookiee button. Now, what's with the toy chicken, Feeney? I sent away for it. The same place we got the rocket chair? Now look, you watch what happens when I wind her up. Hey, haven't we met before? Paris? Rome? Now watch this. See, he takes the fake chicken's hand, and suddenly, in her other hand, appears a German logger. She pulls the trigger and... Maybe there are some buttons we gotta press, huh? No, no, no, no. Here's the trouble. I forgot to put bullets in the gun. See what happens when I pull the trigger. Fellow ducks, Murdoch and I have not been able to rid the club of the chicken. Yeah, we almost got rid of Feeney, but not the chicken. So here's what we suggest. There are 69 of us and only one of him. So we each get a carving knife. You can imagine the poor chicken's dismay at seeing the ducks coming at him arm to the teeth. Life would do no good. Ducks are faster than chickens. Then suddenly, he remembered something he saw a few minutes ago. An old barge had been towed into the bay, Even at that very moment, a plane flew high above it and dropped a bomb. Stop, you ducks, stop. I am a magic chicken. Don't listen to him. I am a magic chicken, and I can pro it. So saying, he pulled a feather from his tail, held it aloft, and proclaimed in a loud chicken voice... I hereby order that yonder barge sitting out in the bay be destroyed. The barge blew up along with Feeney's and Murdock. The chicken was made an honorary duck. And as for Feeney and Murdock, they spent the rest of the winter pulling out their tail feathers and making all kinds of crazy wishes, none of which came true. That's some fable, Pop. Yes, and you can see why I use the adage, birds of a feather flock together. I'd say it a little differently. How so? Birds of a feather pluck together. Go play with Romulus and Remus, son.