MY UNIVERSITY EXPERIENCE & WHAT'S NEXT _ University of Toronto

It's been about a week since I finished my undergraduate degree at Crazy Stuff and with it has come a lot of questions from you guys about what it feels like to be done and what was my university experience like? What is next? So I want to answer all those questions today, not only to catch you up on what's going on with my life, where my headspace is at, but also because I know that this is just a time and length that a lot of students go through. And for me personally, it's a really complicated, weird, exciting time and I want to share that with you because if you're feeling the same way that I'm feeling, then you are not alone. There's a lot to talk about. I'm also going to be answering questions about my living situation, so grab yourself a hot beverage, a snack, and let's just get into things. The question that has been coming up in every single conversation, and honestly the question I've been asking other people who have graduated, is how does it feel to be done? And I am super happy to be finished my undergrad degree. For those of you who don't know, I'll catch you up. I attended the University of Toronto for the past four years where I studied at Rotman Commerce in Business. I'm graduating with a bachelor of commerce, a specialization in management, a minor in economics, and a focus in marketing. And I have just felt really ready, especially the last year, to be finito. I have suffered major senioritis. I just, especially the last little bit there, just couldn't be bothered. And I feel like a lot of people that I talked to felt the same way, which is a good sign because it means I am ready for the next step. But that being said, it is also very weird to be done. It's the first time in my life where I'm not, I don't know what's happening for the next four years. Even when I finished high school I remember feeling a lot of the same feelings I'm feeling right now, but I knew that I was going to be somewhere. I knew in Toronto for the next four years is where I'll be studying. And right now I'm in a situation where I have no clue what I'm going to be doing in four years. And honestly it still doesn't even feel like it's done. I don't think it's going to really hit me until September when everyone else is going back and I'm just not. My university experience was overall pretty great. I'm not going to sugarcoat it and say that it wasn't hard and that I didn't cry every now and then and that the stress wasn't just really overwhelming at times. If you know anything about like U of T or Rotman Commerce, it has a reputation for being a tough school. That being said, I think it's a doable program. I think if you stay on top of things you're going to be fine if you yourself are considering coming to U of T or going to the Rotman Commerce Business Program. The first and second year of university were definitely the hardest. The first being the most difficult. That was the year where I was really like just emotionally not feeling great. I was really overwhelmed with university. A lot of first years are. I was suffering that like hit from the grade dips that happened. You know I started off in high school being like at the top of my class and then I came to U of T and I was very much so not at the top of my class. I dropped like sometimes 30% in my grade averages. Like a 90 student going to a 60% on a certain test that's like the end of the world. So that was a year where I really had to shift my mentality about like my sense of self can't be related to my the grades that I received because if I continued that way I would have had a miserable time in university. It was also adjusting to moving into a new city. I was living in an apartment with five other roommates at Woodsworth College which I did do a dorm room tour so if you want to go check that out you can go see what my first year dorm was like. And that experience with living with roommates in my first year was so great. I got along with all my roommates and I really think that experience was so unique and something I'm never going to get in my life again. But I also just wasn't as happy in first year because I had let YouTube go for a lot of reasons. I felt like I needed to be um I think there was a lot of guilt there if I did anything other than school. This is my view outside the sidewalk by dorm. Second year was a little bit better because I did start doing spending more time on videos but it was probably the most academically difficult because I had a lot of like I had a stats course and an economics course that were the devil. I failed my first test ever in my second year too. It was just a lot. And then third and fourth year were so much different. Fourth year especially was a nice vacation. I mean it was still work but it wasn't to that level. And also in third and fourth year is when I just decided to give more and more time to YouTube. There were definitely times where I gave more time to YouTube than I probably should but it all ended up working out. And I think you know as a whole like my journey throughout university was more enjoyable because like I said I had that secondary thing. So I am a huge advocate that if you are a student that you have something else, a hobby, some interests, things that you can spend time on while in school that aren't school related, that aren't just for your resume. Question that I know though is really on everyone's mind is, Caitlyn, what's next? And I'm sure I'm not the only graduate who just gets that question asked to them on a daily, weekly basis. And it's understandable people are curious about where the next chapter is, where your story is heading. I've definitely been guilty of asking people that question. What shocked me from university is that I always heard that like college and university is where you find yourself. It's where you figure out what you want to do in life. Like this is the year for like figuring out yourself. And I think it's a load of BS. I don't think a lot of people, like some people do, they figure it all out in university. But a lot of people don't. I think everyone feels pressured to have it figured out. You think about it, like life is so like, hopefully you have a long life, right? 80 plus years, fingers crossed. And if that's the case, then like four years is a short amount of time to just suddenly have it all put together. For me personally, I have an idea of what's happening right away. But I don't know, like, like long term exactly what my future is going to look like. I know that I am not going to be getting my master's or MBA, PhD, that seems to be a question a lot of people like expect me to go get that I have a lot of people like, are you sure you're done school because like, you might want to get, you know, your master's or something. But I just feel like that time in my life is, is done. Never say never. But I truly do feel like I'm done with schooling. So what am I going to be doing? I am not looking for jobs right now. I'm actually me, I made the decision to go full time with YouTube. And I feel like when people hear that, they're like, Oh, well, then you've got it all figured out. Like, you got you're working for yourself. A lot of people like have to find jobs and stuff, which is so true, like job hunting. Let me tell you, some of my friends are in that hunt process. It's tough out there. That process is stressful. So yes, I don't have to deal with that aspect of job hunting, because I have a job. But there's a lot of uncertainty with what I'm doing. Not only is my income like not a regular paycheck, like it's like it's not the same thing every month. There's also the fear of whether or not people are just going to stop watching me, maybe people will stop caring, I have to be my own boss, I have to create my own schedule. Another thing that I've kind of addressed before on the channel is that now because I am working for myself, I'm going to be spending a lot more time alone. So will I become a hermit? Who knows? Hopefully not. I have to really prioritize getting out into the world and, and still seeing people. So like, there's a lot of concerns that I have ultimately want to make this decision. Because I think that I have a lot more to say in videos and more to share. I, it feels right. I love doing this. And I also feel like I'm young. And if I don't just take the leap, as scary as that leap can be, I will have major regrets. I'm not married, I don't have kids, obviously. So like, I am in a place where if I fall, it's just me falling, and I'll be able to get things back together. So it just feels like the time to make this step. And I think another question that comes to mind with from a lot of people as well, you know, you did this degree, like, do you think it's a waste? And no, I actually studied business. As I mentioned, I focused in marketing. If I wasn't doing YouTube, I would be getting a job in marketing, probably a position in social media marketing. So this just feels very, actually, like very on brand with my degree, as much as it was great to learn, like some business models and concepts and learn a more traditional style of business. I think a lot of the things I've learned about marketing have actually come from running this channel. So in a way, I'm also continuing my education, because the longer I do this, the more things I'm going to learn. Yeah, so I think it's going to be a great thing. I think it's the dream to be able to study business and then to go off on your own as like an entrepreneur kind of thing. I feel really grateful that this is the position that I'm in. Obviously, it's all thanks to your support. And I can't even begin to describe how much I appreciate you watching and caring to follow along with this journey. And hopefully it's a journey that you continue to find worth watching. Now there's another big change happening in my life. So let's do some shifting around. And we'll discuss that. This right here used to be Andrea's bedroom. And now it will eventually be I think my bedroom. That's the plan right now. This will be my bedroom. My bedroom right now will become my office area slash closet because this bedroom doesn't have a closet. This has been another step that has felt really odd. I really love the living, you know, not a lot of people can say that they successfully lived with their best friend since elementary school. I've known Andrea since grade, well, I've known her since JK kindergarten, but I've been best friends with her since grade three, four. We're essentially family. And it has been like such a special time being able to live in this apartment with her for the past three years. But you know, it just was not the right step for her to stay in the city. So she has gone back to her hometown. And it is weird. It's weird having her not being here. She moved out at the end of April. This is a heads up, I will be taking you along with me as I transform the bedroom and the living room a bit and the office a bit. So stay tuned for that content in the summer slash fall. Let's go make a coffee because I'm needing it. This coffee is so good. Oh, a question that someone had asked me on Instagram that I thought was so good was like, how do you stay in a healthy mental state with all this change happening? And, you know, that's the question that I'm even wondering. Typically, when I go through big shifts in my life, I go through a little blue period, sometimes right away, sometimes it's a delayed reaction. But I think that's like a natural reaction to change because like change is always a little sad because you get like, I'm even getting sentimental a little bit about what's what my life has been like the past four years. But at the end of the day, like change needs to happen to grow. And I always try and keep in the frame of mind that eventually this is going to become my new normal. And it won't feel as foreign as it does now. And when you're in the moment, it feels like you're never going to get past this point. But I think that's the one of the beauties of getting older is that you experience different times in your life where you've felt this way. And you know, like that you you eventually do get out of it. When you were getting ready to go to school, I think you were ready and you were excited. And you didn't cry the first day three weeks into it. Yeah, like I'd pick you up from the bus and we'd get home and you'd go and lie down on the couch and you'd be like this. Oh, not even watching TV. Just like, just you just got past it. And then you were fine. It was just like, I think, because the same thing happened in high school. Oh, yeah. Every stage. Yeah, I do. It's like a pattern with me. Oh, you get a job. Oh, I definitely will. Like I'm prepared for that. University is done to go through a weird day after she gets married. Oh yeah, I guarantee it's going to be every page. Another great question asked on Instagram was what was the biggest lesson you learned in university? And I think it kind of ties back to that. Don't get into a comparison game thing. I had to walk into rooms, especially at Rotman Commerce, like the average I think of people that get into Rotman are early 90s, late 80s. So like, these are really smart people. Well, every room I walked into, I can guarantee you, there were a lot of people smarter than me. There were people that had way more impressive resumes than me better networks than me, someone that is superior to you. And not only those general things, but there are some people that are like math whizzes and eco whizzes and accounting people and you can't be on top for everything. So to continuously try and go for that, it's impossible. And if it is possible, then you're going to drain yourself doing it. Now, it's cliche to say, but like, I truly think the best way to stand out is to just be yourself. There's no one else in the world like you. So I personally valued my personality a lot more than I ever have, especially in environments where I've come across where I feel like people tend to like, especially in certain business settings, or just academic settings, you know, you see people putting on like more of a persona of who they think they should be. And I think that, I don't know, I just don't, that's never been my jam. It works for a lot of people. But for me, I'd rather just like be myself. Even if sometimes the quirkiness in certain situations is maybe not what needs to come out, but I embrace it. And let's let's go to the desk because I am tired of standing. The coffee had to come with me. The question that's been coming up is what kind of content am I going to be doing now that I'm done student stuff. And for the immediate future, you're not going to see much of a change because I do want to compile like videos with my last bits of advice for you. So I want to do like the digital note taking video that I've been promising, and then ultimate study tips video, my ultimate favorite back to school supplies, like just rounding up all of my last tidbits of school wisdom that I have. And I want to do it while it's still fresh in my mind because I do understand that the further you get away from school life, the less and less you're able to get into that frame of mind because yourself in school mode is just a very different kind of human being. So that's what I want to focus on for the summer. But I will be shifting content into adulting life a lot more self care and self love content because that's something I'm really passionate about more chatty videos, more organization content, the decor series, planner videos aren't going anywhere, routine videos, weeks in my life where I show you the process of like transitioning out of university and what's it like to work for yourself. I want to share everything with you. And hopefully it doesn't feel like completely different because at the end of the day, it's still me. That's here. I'm still the same person that's trying to figure life out. So I would like for you to join me in that figuring out process. Second last question here is how did I change in university? I've become a lot more confident. I think that's just natural with age, you become more comfortable with who you are as a human being. I've also been someone that just, you know, is more I think understanding of other people's situations. You know, I've been exposed to more diversity living in the city and going to school with people from different cultures. And I like I have to understand that I don't know everything but I think it's important to respect everyone and to respect that everyone's journey is a little bit different than yours. And just because it's different doesn't mean that it's worse or better. It just is. The final question is do I miss university? No. The pain is still still too fresh. So I am very much so happy that I'm not in like midterm or final exam mode. I'm sure as I get more and more distant from university, I'll be like, oh, that was such a great time. But if I ever get in that headspace, I'll just like watch an old week in my life from this time and be like, oh, yeah, that that was not great. But jokes aside, I am gonna miss like the act of going to class and chatting with classmates and and being in a spot where like so many people my age are because that is probably not going to be something that I have much more of in the future. The act of learning too is something I'm going to miss like learning on a daily basis. So I want to make that more of an intentional part of my daily life by reading different topics and and reading articles online, watching the news, just immersing myself in subjects I'm unfamiliar with and continuing that learning process because I have not learned nearly a fraction of the things that I could potentially learn out there. So I think that's important to to keep my mind fresh and sharp by keep fueling it with new things. I've been talking for far too long, so I'm going to wrap it up here. Hopefully that gave you guys a good thorough scoop on what's going on with my life, what this transition is like, and there's going to be more to touch on as the weeks and months go on. But if you have any specific questions, let me know in the comment section. I'll be there answering and chatting with you guys. Let me know if you yourself are finishing university and share what you're feeling because I want to know that I'm not alone out there. I'm sure I'm not. And yeah, give this video a big thumbs up if you enjoyed it. Hit the subscribe button if you want to continue and follow along with more of my journey throughout hopefully the next few years and years to come. And I will see you all very soon with a new video. So until then, bye everyone!