ExclusiveDolley Madison: The Presidentress

Welcome to American Legends, I'm Tiffany Brannan. Each culture has its legends, and that could be myths or different stories. But here in America, our greatest legends are the wonderful heroes who are right from our history pages. Now, some of these heroes are very famous, and some are obscure. But each person deserves to be discovered, because each man or woman stands as a great example of how we can be better Americans in our daily lives. It's easy to look back at the history of the world and say that women had no role in society, especially politics, before the right to vote in the early 20th century. But if you dig deeper and learn more about the individuals, especially these first ladies, you realize that no matter what the political state of women was at the time in the country, there were many ladies who used their intelligent, cleverness, and virtues to help their husbands in their careers. A great example of this is the fourth first lady, Dolly Madison. Many first ladies are given the title of the first modern first lady, or the example of how first ladies would be in the future. Perhaps one of the earliest ones to have this title, or to be given this honor, is Dolly Madison. She was the wife of James Madison, fourth president of the United States, but interestingly, she served as first lady before her husband was president. She was an unofficial hostess and first lady for the president before, Thomas Jefferson, because he was a widower, and occasionally he used his daughter as first lady, but when she was not in town, Dolly Madison would serve in that position, because as the wife of the secretary of state, she was already very involved in Washington society. Dolly Madison had a fascinating upbringing. She was the eldest of eight children in a very strong Quaker family from North Carolina. Her father struggled with different businesses as he moved to different states, and eventually, after he died, her mother moved back to Philadelphia and started a boarding house. By that point, Dolly, originally named Payne, had gotten married to a man named John Todd. They had some children together, but tragically, in the winter of 1793, both her husband and one of her sons died in the same week of yellow fever. This left Dolly Madison as a 26-year-old widow with a young son. She lived with her mother at her boarding house, but, like most widows, hoped of gaining another husband. Now, Dolly was a very lovely young lady, tall and voluptuous, and very striking. At this time, she still was a Quaker, because her first husband was, but it wasn't long before she made a friend, Aaron Burr. Now, this man was a very important member of the early American government. If you're familiar with the musical Hamilton, you may know him as the man who shot Hamilton, and that indeed was one of his claims to infamy, I would say, but before that, and before he tried to break away from the United States and start his own government, he was a very important member of making the United States great, and he was a good friend of Thomas Jefferson and James Madison, with whom he had gone to college. Now, without any male relatives, any brothers or uncles or father-in-law, after her husband's death, Dolly needed to appoint a legal male guardian for her son in case anything happened to her, because he was only two. So, she named Aaron Burr as the legal godfather. That shows what good friends they were, because he was staying at her mother's boarding house at the time. Throughout history, many historians or historical fiction writers have insinuated that there was a romance between them. There's no proof of that. Most likely, they were just friends, but there was a romance with another member of the early government who took a liking to her the minute he saw her. That was James Madison. He saw this remarkably striking young woman and determined that he had to meet her, although she was significantly younger than he was and taller and much more striking in her appearance. He was not without his experience in romantic relationships. He'd never been married, but he had had a few sweethearts over the years. He'd never settled down, though, because he was very focused on his legal work and working in the government. He requested to Aaron Burr that he introduce them. When Dolly heard about this, she was very impressed, because Madison was very important in the government. She wrote to a friend that she had been requested to have a meeting with the great little Madison, and he was instantly struck with her, and apparently she wanted to make a good impression because she dressed in a beautiful burgundy silk gown to meet him. He was very impressed, and they began courting. She played hard to get by leaving town and making him pursue her, but before long, they were married. It turned out to be not only an advantageous marriage, because he had a good position in society, but also a very loving marriage. Now, people who wrote about James Madison often said that he was not particularly cheerful and not very outgoing. One woman even referred that he must be the most grim man she'd ever met, but that's very different from the stories we hear of their close friends, who said that Dolly and James Madison were one of the rowdiest couples you could find. They enjoyed running through their plantation and playing games with their grandchildren and nieces and nephews and having a good deal of fun. There even are stories that she would give him piggyback rides because she was so much larger than he was, and it's hard to picture because they both seem so refined, but it just reminds us that they were people too. Even though the style of society was so much more formal at the time, that doesn't mean that they didn't like to have their little games and their little jokes. And above all, they loved having lively conversations at the dinner table. And when they were back at Montpellier, their plantation, that table could have a lot of people at it, because including all their relatives, their siblings, their nieces and nephews, there were as many as 20 people at the table on a daily basis. They never had any children together, but James Madison did adopt her son. Dolly was the first First Lady to have a permanent residence in the White House, which was the new residence of the President and his wife. She also was the first First Lady to attend the inauguration. Neither Martha Washington nor Abigail Adams, although both were very supportive of their husbands, attended the inauguration. And when she attended, she wore a very striking white gown with a turban with a big feather on it. You see, when she married James Madison, he was Episcopalian, so she was expelled from the Society of Friends, as the Quakers called themselves. And it seems that she didn't miss it for a minute, because she immediately doffed the very formal, conservative forms of dress that were mandatory for a Quaker life, and instead turned to very bright colors, very French in style, sometimes with even lower necklines and feathers, bright jewels, and her favorite accessory, the turban. The Madisons also started the trend of having the Inaugural Ball, because the day of the inauguration, she changed into another fabulous gown with a turban, and gave an Inaugural Ball to welcome all their friends from both sides of the political aisle to celebrate Madison's victory. She was very warm, welcoming, and open to everyone, no matter what their political differences were, because by that point, there were two very strong political parties. There was a lot of criticism. There was a very tense political time with the War of 1812, but some onlookers commented, everyone loves Mrs. Madison, to which she replied, Mrs. Madison loves everyone. People enjoyed her company so much, because she was very warm and welcoming, and she made the White House a warm, welcoming place. She also made James Madison more warm and welcoming, and helped him go against his naturally cold and reserved attitude. She brought him out of himself. And many people said that they couldn't help liking him more because of her. His first opponent for presidency, Charles Pinckney, commented, I think I could have beat Mr. Madison, but I couldn't beat the two of them together. She was very instrumental in hosting these squeezes, the very popular parties, and having informal events, which grew larger and larger throughout the week. In the evening, having music, having conversation during the day, and she even encouraged other ladies to get more involved in knowing what was happening with politics by going to see hearings. She called these the dove hearings, because like a group of doves, they would all get together and go to see the hearings. She also became very involved in charities, on a more public way. Other first ladies had done charitable works, but they tended to do them in private. She very publicly was involved with the Washington Orphan Asylum, and was named first directress. She helped with fundraising and campaigning. At this time, the term first lady still was not used for the president's wife, but she was called either the presidentress or lady presidentress. And she was considered absolutely regal. She helped continue the decoration of the White House, because it was still rather bare when they first moved in. She even worked alongside an architect and his wife to make it much more hospitable and bring in beautiful furnishings, striking that American balance between democracy and aristocracy in terms of how beautiful and ornate it was, yet approachable. During the War of 1812, the British actually invaded Washington and started burning some of the key buildings. They burnt out both the White House and the Capitol building, so that nothing but the exterior shell remained. Madison was not there at that point. He had other duties, because he was very concerned with the war. But Mrs. Madison was in the White House trying to gather up things, and while her assistants and her aides were urging her to get in her carriage and leave before she ended up being taken prisoner, she kept a cool head, and she instructed her servants to take the famous portrait of General Washington, painted by Gilbert Stuart, off the wall, because she knew it would be burnt otherwise. And she calmly instructed them to take the time to, at first they started taking the screws out, but it was a very complex frame, so eventually she instructed them to break the frame and take the portrait out, but she kept them from rolling it up like they wanted to do, because she knew that would ruin it. And interestingly, that's her biggest claim to fame. People know her most for saving that portrait. It reflects her idea of serving the greater population and being selfless, caring about her country before herself. Dolly Madison didn't do a lot of writing, so there aren't many quotes from her. A lot of them come from letters that she wrote to her husband and different friends and family members. But my favorite quote of hers is this. It is one of my sources of happiness never to desire a knowledge of other people's business. I think it's fascinating that she made that statement, considering that every source views her as a very friendly, outgoing woman. Nevertheless, she didn't want to prime people's business. She enjoyed their society. She enjoyed being very friendly and open, welcoming people into her home and her heart. But she didn't want to just know all about their business. She believed that privacy was important, and I think that quote is such an important lesson for us all to learn. The culture of social media has made it an obsession of our society to know about everything that everybody's doing, and to feel the need to share everything we're doing, or else we'll have some kind of fear of missing out if we don't constantly know what all our friends and family and even random strangers on the other side of the world are doing at all times. But Dolly Madison shows us that oftentimes, we can have deeper, better, and more meaningful relationships if we don't just get preoccupied with knowing all about people's business. Instead, get to know their hearts and welcome them as other individuals, especially when you consider how she started, really, the bipartisanship of welcoming people who were opponents as much as friends. If we know all about other people's business, we're all too likely to just judge them for their beliefs, for what they've done, for different views they may hold. But if we get to know them as individuals, as citizens, as friends, and as human beings, we're more likely to judge them fairly. Dolly Madison remains a great example of a First Lady who served alongside her husband, who did a lot to help society, to be a great example to other women, and to encourage her husband to be the best man he could be. Although she was much larger than him in stature, she was able to support him as a good helpmate. And I believe another quote from her was that, the woman is the shadow of a man. And, like many shadows, she was larger than her husband in physical size, but she was a wise, virtuous, and modest support to him as his wife. Thank you for spending this time with me talking about one of the greatest early First Ladies, Dolly Madison. Learning about her life is a great inspiration to all of us of how we can weather difficulties in life, such as the tragedies of grief and death, but see that they can be part of the important work which we will later do in life. I encourage you to learn more about Dolly Madison's fascinating life and take her example as how we can use the challenges that we face to make more of ourselves and be better members of society. Thank you for spending this time with me. Goodbye.