The Korean restaurant was bustling with happy diners. Before me sat a steaming bowl of fragrant tofu stew, an irresistible array of side dishes, and beautifully crafted cakes that filled the air with sweetness. My children smiled warmly as they softly sang “Happy Birthday.” Having completed my 6th decade of life and stepped into what the Chinese call “the age of er-shun” — the age when one hears life’s truths with ease and acceptance — I found my heart overflowing with gratitude and happiness. At 60, one realizes that happiness is often much quieter than one imagined in youth. It may simply be a meal shared with loved ones, a birthday song sung softly across the table, and the privilege of growing older together.
Middle age brings far more farewells than hellos
In ancient times, people generally lived much shorter lives. Even among China’s emperors — men who enjoyed wealth, power, and every imaginable luxury — more than eighty percent failed to reach the age of 60. To celebrate one’s 60th birthday was therefore considered a truly joyous milestone. When I was younger, life felt like an endlessly spinning top — juggling family responsibilities, career obligations, and countless daily concerns. Retirement has gradually quieted the pace of life. Desires have become fewer, attachments lighter. I no longer feel compelled to compete with others or argue over trivial matters. Perhaps this is what Confucius meant by er-shun — a state of calm acceptance and gentle understanding.
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